Mind intentionally left blank...

Oh-kids-these-days

2012-01-30T15:00:00.001+05:30

Not surewhere but 2yr old niece has learnt the word “maga”, probably from some hindi-to-kannada-horribly-translated-advertisement

Yesterdaywe had few dignitaries at home, one being principal of prestigious Medical College for lunch. They were all praises for2 years old; that she is very active, brilliant & kept pinching her cheeksas often as possible. Lunch done, when they were about to take leave, the kidshouts “bye maga” to him.

Not sure ifany of his students had guts to call him that & I am very sure he’llremember this child for many more years to come.

Friday The 13th - 2

2012-01-20T18:37:00.000+05:30

“I told you guys. Now what do we do”, Tilak was shivering

“It was not our fault you idiot. That man, out of no where popped on the road. I just couldn’t control the car. & moreover studying “Signals & Systems” subject whole night had my brain fucked”, Sanjay mumbled.

“Lo eg yenro madodhu. What are we supposed to do? I am still young; I don’t want to go to jail. I told you all, bloody lets prepare tea at room anta where will you guys listen? That dumb vehicle had to give haath with the head lights today only? Arghhh I feel like crying man crying”, Dilip was in tears. Almost.

“Guys chill. It was pitch dark & I am sure that man wouldn’t have noted down the vehicle number. Also there was no one around; there is no way the police can spot us. As far as I checked the car there was no damage. Let’s watch some TBBT please”

Story till now

“No major things on spot sahebre”, replied Madevu

“How can you guys not find anything near the spot?”, my anger knew no bounds. It frustrates me when people cannot do their work correctly. Not doing work at all would still be a good category, but doing it in a bad way bugged me the most

I was on my way to the accident spot is when I saw that the man had two kids; one 10ish & the other 7ish; a boy & a girl. Too bad I thought; but destiny, who’d know the marma behind that, it shocks you more surprises you very less.

My driver Devappa was reading “taranga”. Oh sweet lord, what is about this guy, why does he have to read such fortnightlies? Magazines like “Sudha”, “Taranga” according to me were for three groups –

One - who traveled every day by bus/train, they would pick it up for time pass. This category actually never read the magazine; they flip through the photos or pictures to spend time.

Two – who were the adventurous “we want something new” ladies, like trying new recipe or putting a new rangoli or doing padhabandha while the chapathi got burnt.

Three – some one who only read “agony aunt” section, as in whose sex life is dull, what are the various problems teens have, how the widow is having an affair with a married man, yeah trust me there are people who would read only this section of the magazine.

Not sure what category this man whom I spend most of my day with was looking for. We reached the accident spot; the road was re-tarred recently & had no pot-holes for the 100mts stretch. I saw lot of tier marks, but the most prominent one being of a 4-wheelar probably of the hard & sudden brakes the driver had to apply.

“Have you taken a pic of these marks?”

“Hoon sahebre, clicked”, said Madevu

He was right, my staff. I couldn’t find anything interesting in the nearby vicinity. I walked almost 100 steps towards the main road. Still negative, nothing!

“B report sir, why so much trouble”, driver repeated himself.

I sighed. . . . .

Iron Leg

2012-01-19T11:49:00.000+05:30

It’s all about stars. Yeah, STARS, you read correctly. Not the ones behind whom you run for an autograph or photograph & within seconds upload the pic on FB, not those stars people. Your stars, nimma nakshathra that make your raashi, kula, gothra yada yada.

I don’t see a point about “your day today”, that astrologer keeps saying “you will get money, you will get money” since 3 months, bleedy my bank balance is 2 digits by 5th of every month. What this astrologer failed to predict was about this shaNi of mine, one which is not hovering over my head but on my foot, I call it “meT shaNi” or the “Foot shaNi”.

If you know me personally, you will know how tall I am, which is why I am never permitted to wear heels. This was the first phase of the shaNi, not letting me wear what I like, high heels; due to which my wardrobe (the ones in the verandah like railway boogie) only contains flats. They are so flat that you can call me “Down to Earth” person; had the urge to call myself maNNina magaLu but no, I’d rather be my appa’s daughter only.

If you know me a little extra personally, you will also know how big my feet are, dad calls them “Devil’s feet”, I choose to differ, see people who were responsible to genes I am made up of have no rights to comment. & if they have to, they should comment on their gene mix-up not otherwise. Coming back, the feet are big; big as in the mid-foot is broad preventing me from wearing a certain style of footwear that involves semi-circle shaped thread that fits the mid-foot. My enquiries for footwear start from “slippers thorsi – last size”, I am lucky if I get any else life & leg have to move on, which is the next phase of the shaNi.

Just when I had lost hopes, shop near “Shivrampet, Mysore” or ones from “Dasara exhibition”, err basically “2 pairs for 300 bucks” types started flourishing, life was beautiful again. I was delighted with the concept, I could have as many as I wanted because they are cheap, as many colors I wanted coz they are cheap; they are stylish & again coz they are cheap. Feet were kicking only till the first incident. The shaNi kaaTa had officially started.

I was happily walking with my Pati who was then my fiancée & that was our first date. This is what I like, this is what I don’t like, I spoke & spoke, the man was just listening & behold slipper broke. So did my ego. I mean imagine myself chit-chatting with my to-be-husband with total class & this happens, meT shaNi was laughing at me. We had to cancel off the date, Pati says now that it was nature’s way of telling him “ee huDgi na, beDa!!!” Nonsense!

The saga continued. We were in Bangalore, booked tickets to “Raavan” & were late; I was running to the theatre & behold slipper cuts. No no, we did not cancel the movie, this time though I was prepared; I took Pati’s kerchief & tied around my leg & slippers like as if I was wounded. Once the movie was done, went to a slipper shop next to the theater & bought a pair. “I will wear the new ones, don’t pack”, I told the shop-keeper. He kept asking me where my old slippers were so that he will pack the same, & I ignored. He did give me weird looks when he saw me leaving the old slippers, may be he assumed his shop was a “bomb target”.

Anyhoo, it happened in office as well & thanks to Pav, I did not have to take leave just because of shaNi & his mischief. She had a pair in her car & the same was worn till EOD. Latest it was on the annual day, the biggest day where I had to receive award on stage, that day my slipper worth 1200 bucks had to cut? & what did I do? Sent Pati back home & to get another pair. I can imagine how MIL would have fumed that her son had to carry slippers to the daughter-in-law. & nature would have again laughed at Pati “see I told you ee huDgi beDa anta”.

Every one says “shaNi meTkonDide” but in my case it is “meT shaNi”. Not sure what homa or havan I’ll have to perform. But until then “Kaal”-aaya tasmai namaha.

Agni mattu maLe

2012-01-17T16:30:00.000+05:30

I had hearda lot on how “Agni mattu maLe” as a novel by Girish Karnad is “against IndianCulture”, but had never got a chance to read it, thanks to Bahuroopi Festivalat “RangayaNa” witnessed it live yesterday. It is a tale of deception andpassion, very true. This was staged by naTana, under the able leadership ofMandya Ramesh. Everyone in the play is dishonest & has filthier intentionsexcept two people in love, play has following characters

Raibhya –Old man who has two sons Puravasu & Aravasu

Raibya’s deadbrother has a son – Yavakri

Vishaka –wife of Puravasu who before marriage was in love with Yavakri

Nithiley –love of Aravasu

Puravasu –Sage who is performing a yaga to get rain for the village

Demon –illegitimate son of Raibhya born out of Rakshasi mother

Play startsas someone seeking permission from “Puravasu”, to stage a play, where “Aravasu”,(one who carries the play along) wants to be a part of. Then there is aplay-in-a-play concept (yes much before there was inception). Aravasu the Brahminboy loves Nithiley the tribal girl, between the consequences of their love, Vishakasleeps with Yuvakri (who just returned after meeting lord Indra after vigoroustapasya) found out by her father-in-law “Raibya” who gives shaapa to “Yavakri”that he will die in the hands of “Demon”.

Vishaka runsto inform Yavakri, but soon realizes that he tricked her to sleep with him justto irk his “Doddappa” & to kill him. Vishaka after knowing his misdeedspills the magical water he has to save himself from the demon & thus demonkills Yavakri. Aravasu is entrusted the task to provide final rights to Yavakridue to which he misses his chance to meet Nithiley’s father in time to seek herhand for marriage. She is now someone else’s fiancée.

Puravasu whois performing a yaga since 7 years for rain comes home after hearing his wife’saffair, when she confronts to him that her father-in-law is targeting her forhis wrong intentions, he kills his dad. He asks Aravasu to do the final rightsas he has to get back to the yaga.

Few dayslater when Aravasu visits the yaga, Puravasu tells everyone that Aravasu killedhis father & makes sure his brother is beaten to death by the villagers. Buthe is rescued by Nithiley who has run from home to be with Aravasu. Aravasu’sonly hope being Nithiley is also killed, by her husband for leaving him, &just when world comes crashing down on Aravasu, Indra arrives & says hewill grant a boon. Aravasu is torn between asking Nithiley’s life or Demon’smoksha, but finally chooses the later. The play ends with villagers dancing tothe rain.

I fell inlove with “Aravasu”, both the character & the person who portrayed thatcharacter. The play lasted for 2.5hrs never losing its charm or boring theaudience. Vanaranga is an open-air stage, but none cared the cold temperature.Its astonishing how none of these characters every made a slightest slippage,in terms of dialogues or flow of events in spite of being in differentoccupations all of them pursue their passion of theatre.

Bahuroopi National theater festival is held in "Rangayana" for a week long, & the tickets are very reasonable too. Do make a visit if you are a movie enthusiast, none of the plays will disappoint.

Film: Sidhlingu

2012-01-16T12:27:00.000+05:30

Finally, movie has released. I guess everyone from “Guruprasad” paaLya carry this ego stating “Directors are the only people who toil hard in the movie rest just do a time pass”, one more entry to this list is “Vijayaprasad” – director of the movie “Sidhlingu”. Thanks to his nonsense, movie got delayed almost a year & when everything was finally in place, he ruins it by dirty climax. Its like somehow he has to end the movie & he does, read on how.

Movie has an introduction in “YedheLu Manjunatha” style, “Sidhlingu” loves car since he was a “haalu kuDiyo magu”. He is a normal huDga who plays pranks against his enemy gang, but when the gang leader comes to school in car, befriends her. Before his reel love changes into real love, the girl takes ticket in a car accident.

Next phase “Sidhlingu” is in college, taking drop from “always taruNi” AnDalamma. She is waiting for her husband in “Maddur” railway station, like she knows he will come in train only. In between, one-day trips happen & so does “that akasmika” where “Sidhlingu” loses his V. Just then he also loses his parents & decides to move to “Bangalore”.

He is now a soap selling salesman who still hasn’t let go his dreams of having a car. One day he reads that a particular vintage car is for sale & meets “Pasha” uncle who lives alone coz his wife died & son is now a rowdy. Introduction song in “Puneeth’s” voice is peppy, just that it has to be in one loop. “Pasha” uncle gives many tests to see if his car will be taken “care” & finally is ok with selling to “Sidhlingu”. Our hero starts accumulating money, & in this process meets “MangaLa”, school teacher Ramya. “Yellello oDuva manase” is one of the best songs of 2012 so far & the way it has been shot is awesome, gives “ee sanje yaakagide” feel.

With much difficulty, Sidhlingu buys the car & start title track which is the only song that has been shot spending some amount of money. Not outdoor locations mind you, but with the help of graphics & foreign huDgis. “Pasha” uncle dies leaving a document to hero & asking him open on a particular date. Meanwhile “Sidhlingu” proposes with “mobile ge sim card haakilla” dialogue to “MangaLa” & gets slapped. Start *chombo chombo* song, this again is played in loop. Shows how the director did not want the music director to take away accolades.

“Sidhlingu” opens the document & sees “Form 29”, goes to RTO, sees anDalamma & loses the form. Pasha’s rowdy son has registered a complaint in the police station that his dad’s car is lost, & police arrest “Sidhlungu” as he is unable to show any documents. Car is surrendered to rowdy son, but good police staff, know that hero is of no fault & asks a thief to steal the car, thereby giving the car back to hero. But within no time, car is seized & “mangaLa” wants to show “kaDlekaayibeeja”, hence a big fight erupts between, hero, police & rowdy.

Police uncle shoots rowdy but it hits “MangaLa”. Movie end. It’s so abrupt. With such a lovely story, two awesome people acting in the movie, it is very bad for the sandalwood audience to come out of the movie hall cribbing. Director fails to utilize both the actors, there is no grip in MangaLa’s characters apart from money lending & giving it back. Yogi’s does a commendable job with his role; his dialogue delivery has reached a pinnacle. Music by Anoop is the positive aspect. Finally director, apart from the narration & dialogues, there is nothing else to be spoken about. The industry will never grow till such egos exist.

Friday the 13th - 1

2012-01-13T16:58:00.001+05:30

“Jason who?” I asked my wifewho went on blabbering about some guy killing students who were camping.

“Those students from thatpart of the world are the dumbest. Every damn movie has the same tale, 5 ofthem go camping, 2 are couples & they start making out after coming out ofgroup, & get killed one by one. Last one survives & kills themurderer. Finally a year later, killer comes back again & says “I know whatyou did”, I laughed hard.

Janwi wasn’t happy. She stillinsisted there was something called “Friday the 13^th Jinx”. I wouldn’tbelieve. I mean my work would never allow me to get into such superstitions. 30years in the Police department with two promotions, too many transfers, two CM medals – I was termed a “nut-case” in the department. I was like aNNavru in “Parashurama”movie; work came first. You can see my badge for my name; Purushotham.T.L & T.Lcertainly doesn’t mean tube light.

My wife & I are marriedfor quite sometime now. Not sure how many years. See, men come into the worldwith memory loss, & that’s the best thing for the ladies to bank on. Whatis the fun without “Darling, remember what day it is today?” sort of questionfrom your girl & that confused look on your face making her upset, &then you making up with ….“Puru, they are calling you over the wireless. Why don’tyou keep this thing with you? Such a headache”, mumbled wifey.

“Able NR answering”

“Control to Able NR sir,there has been an accident near CCH College. The deceased died on spot & body has beenshifted to RK hospital. Just for your information. Authorities are yet torecognize the body”

“Received”

“So another accident is it?No one is safe these days. I told you Friday the 13^th isn’t safeeither”, Janwi was used listening to such news by now.

“I am going to RK hospital”,I was not in a mood to listen to the jinx all over again.

Jeep driver had dozed offwhile reading “Sudha”. I wonder how men read magazines like “Sudha”. Isn’t thattoo feminine? & what do you get reading that? Instead one could buy morenewspapers, I thought.

“Sir, that dead person is aged35-40. & I think death happened around 5am”,driver gave me some more info.

“5am? What vehicle was this guy riding?” I asked

“Sirr, this is hit & run,with the clothes he was wearing mostly he’d come jogging. Also we did not findany vehicle near the body”, & we had reached RK hospital. “Lets just put a B report& close off the case”, driver had his own suggestion.

My cold stare was enough forhim to shut-up. Everyone has suggestions, I repeat everyone. But when it comesto their work they go looking for advice. Ha, this is the case with these agonyaunts as well. I am sure they are the first people who run to the counseling centers.I reached the postmortem room to be welcomed by my staff with the salute.

“Sahebre, post-motum over. Hedead 5:30am. Vehicle fast come hit. Body picked to wife”, Madevugasped for breath. Pot-bellied, gutka mouthed, hardly knowing any English, yeahthat was him. I signaled him to stop.

I saw the body. Height 6’1.Weight 90+. Well-built. Wheatish or godhi complexion. Somewhere in mid 30s. Right handsmudged due to the impact, right leg hurt, a deep cut on his head, face as neat as it could be. Mythoughts were disturbed by a wailing lady. She was cursing lord.

“Sahebra his mrs”, Madevu wassad too.

“What all have you collectedfrom the accident spot”, I asked.

~~~~ Wait is not too far

Vote Of Thanks!

2012-01-11T19:18:00.000+05:30

Well Well, this place surelooks dusty & cobwebs!! Hello dear readers, how have you been? How is the NewYear treating you? Thank you for all the concerns over the mails, yours truly isdoing very well, & obviously is hail & healthy.

Every time mother hands overmy jathaka to any astrologer the first thing they come up with is “she willlive 100 years”, so yeah you have to tolerate me for that long. Coming back towhy I vanished, last post I did mention, about the Annual Day celebrations atwork.

Over a month, meetings, schedules,emails, phone calls happened; apprehensions, anxiousness were part of life.There was no plan B, & plan A looked very hazy. Every holiday was given a skip;Pati’s birthday was sobered down et el for the smooth execution of the event. &what happened on Jan 7^th 2012 will be etched in bright colors.

Our VP wrote & I quote “The14th Annual Day Celebrations of SPI was a spectacular success and I’d like tothank each of you for the energy and enthusiasm that you brought to the event. I’dlike to personally thank each of you for all the extra hours spent the greatideas in the build-up to the event and the seamless coordination that made SPIStars the most memorable event ofthe year.”

A lot of thank you hasalready happened over the mails, but I had to put it here, so that few yearsdown the line, the mails might be gone but this post will stay.

To begin with it was Rachna who managed to handle everycommunication related aspect of the pre-event itself, then people who weresportive enough to pose for the posters – Abijith,Ankith, Appanna, Harikumar, Parineeta & Vishal. Not to forget

Shruti& Shravati, putting across theseposters at all strategic spots of SPIcity. Praveen& Pavan for helping in theMelodic Contest & making it a grand success thereby helping us introducethe concept of External Performers – Srinivas D & Chaithra H G.

Reni a.k.aReni Dayal, who has been a backbone of the event, making sure panic situationswere addressed at ease.

Praveen& Manju making sure the auditionswent smooth; judgment wasn’t biased, announcing results, assisting with stage rehearsals& making sure all the cultural aspects were colorful.

Prasad, Divyashree & Kamala maam for beingthe judges, Sairaj sir for makingsure the invites went to right people in right numbers.

Sujata forcoordinating with awards, awardees & the MC, Sujay, Pradeep & Ravibabu at the entry of the venuekeeping count & a strict vigil over miscreants. Naveedh Aslam, taking care of the snacks; Revathi & Arpanawelcoming the external guests & taking care of them. All the GDMs, SeniorPMs who took care of food counters along with Tanmoy, Hemanth, Shruthi, Shilpa, Pavithra, Sanjay, Rekha.
Aby for the job backstage, so apt for the role. Teju & Harris for taking care of navigating execs on stage & back.

Vathsa forall the financial aspects, Melwinfor all the matured decisions, my heart felt thanks.

Big cheer to all the execs for the amount of time you spenton rehearsals in spite of busy schedules, & Shridhar MS for making them learn the moves rather quick & in asimple way. This was the lovely highlight of the night. We all loved your performances.Participants, without your practice,hard-work, and the stage would look very dull, so thank you, it was niceknowing you all. The amount of freshness you add is immense.

Mr. Srinivasfrom Vani press for printing lovely invite in a very short notice, Feroz & Sajid from Dream Merchants, the event management team, RS Graphicsfor the creative, Lakshman & Rishi, from Silent Shores for the venue & tasty food.

Srinivas Dfor the awesome melody on stage, it was dream come true listening to him beginthe event with an awesome Kannada number “Kushale Kshemave”, Chaitra HG who enthralled the audiencewith “Huduga Huduga”, Manikandan& Francis for the lovely band,every one that I know only had praises for this external event.

GK forletting us know during initial hiccups that he was with us completely. Shirley, Krishnan & Srini,thank you loads for every thing, more than the outcome of the event, workingwith you all has been the most wonderful experience to me.

Hello All

2011-12-22T14:51:00.002+05:30

It is that time of the year again. Annual Day at work.
Too busy running around things, & hence the absence.

While you guys are here, why don't you mail me what your new year plans are?

Film: The Dirty Picture

2011-12-05T18:08:00.001+05:30

Well. Well.It’s been ages since I wanted to re-watch a movie & this, this movie, has wavedthat magic. Why? I will not repeat the “Entertainment”-wala dialogue & boreyou guys to death, its Vidya – for whatever that was covered & not shownall this while, is displayed fully, in all angles possible, & not even aninch of it is vulgar. Sexy – yes, Offensive – Nope. It is her movie all the waynot with the looks but with the character she portrays. & apart from her itis Rajat Aroraa’s script that leaves you speechless for a minute & the nextminute you want to stand up & whistle. Finally director Milan Luthria aptlydepicts Silk's struggle in a male-dominated industry, without hampering herpersonal space.

I havealways fancied suicidal stories, & that curiosity initially dragged me tothe movie. Of course Pati didn’t complain. Movie starts with a little village girltelling her mom that she wants to get into the movie buzz. & a day beforeher wedding she runs to TamilNadu, to try her fate. Between also starts “I-am-a-man-&-you-are-single-come-sleep-with-me”saga. She is brave enough to handle that. She takes up a small “whip” sequence& soon turns into a sensation, the silk sensation. Adding to that is herromance between the Kant, yeah Kant & not “C” brothers, that turns into enmitysoon. As the opportunities start to depreciate, she finds alcohol as company. Thesilence starts to kill her & she decided to produce a movie, that latergets doomed. Just when something nice is about to happen, she decides death isthe best.

NaseerudhinShah looks what he needs to be looked. Tushar Kapoor is the weakest link in themovie (especially when he *tries* to dance). Emraan, looks convincingly hot. Nylais the Shobha De? Rest of the crew is not worth discussing. Oh wait, thatbackground nakka nakka is awesome. Bappi Da, the golden man has done it again.All in all, Dirty is the new Beautiful.

Film: Saarathi

2011-11-28T14:57:00.001+05:30

This movie happeneda while ago, writing is a little late. With apologies let’s start, the onlyreason I went to this movie was to pass time. & that for a long time (afterParamaathma mishap) not even one goodmovie was watched. Post Darshan episode, whenever I see him talking aboutwomen, respecting them in his movies, there is a weird feeling. That he isfaking it, & “his acting is very natural” image is tarnished.

Darshan isriding autos, returning packages that were forgotten, fighting villains whobreak glass having ShankarNag’s photo, making police realize the amount of halkaness in them & havingnightmares about killing his father. Meanwhile heroine is met, songs are sung,love starts & on the day of proclaiming, she is taken away by her sodharamaava to their heritage villaayyo village.

Heroreaches village in search of heroine, a typical *who fights this goon gets thegirl setup* & hero obviously wins it. After much ado, it is realized thathero is son of that village soil, who was misquoted of killing his father byhis own chikappa whose son is going to marry heroine & heroine was alreadyhero’s wife with parents exchanging vows when they were playing kunTabille. (annaivLe nin sose)

Fights,fights & more fights. The reality is known to villagers who will killchikappa & his son. Hero & heroine marry.

Full marksto Dinakar was an awesome swamake story (al though parts of it have beenflipped from Telagu movies), neat direction (I hardly found any flaws), Darshanbest in stunts & amazing dialogue delivery, Deepa – no comments (kindlystop taking her into your movies), whoever did the sets – great work, musichummable.

Any daybetter than Paramaathma

Why this Kolahala?

2011-11-23T18:22:00.001+05:30

It’s a racistsong. Yes that “white & back” song. That so called soup song; these tamizhguys keep bluffing about their language, how it is rich, BodhiDharman did that& this, yet they came up with soup song-aa? Why? Don’t they know its partof North Indian thaali?

OK agreed,some random guy wrote the lyrics as soon as Aishwarys (as Big B wroteRajnikanth’s daughter) said that this song has to be fun-filled in ten minutes,& Dhanush in full feeling sang, why deliberately reveal it? & thenclaim, ashooo that was accidentally stolen & leaked. You have no confidencein your tune & lyrics & singer?

& allthis million hits are total tricks. Post recording, & fake leaking thesong, the daughter-aLiya duo went home & checked the views. Zero. Dhanush becamesad & Rajni had to pitch in, his one click is equal to whatever hits on thepage now *insert some na oru timesomething-something dialogue*

You socalled we-wont-talk-in-other-languages-other-than-Kannada-in-November people,shame on you. Why are you listening, re-listening, downloading, and sending othersvia email, Bluetooth? Just flag hoisting is your Kannada prema is it? How muchmore baTTehari on this song huh? KannaDambe will never forgive you.

With much disappointment,I am off. To write “thiLi saaru” song. Bye

Which way? This way?

2011-11-21T18:22:00.001+05:30

P.S: Peoplewith “why don’t you try GPS?” views are forbidden from reading this post.

Life isjourney, you should know your destination & all they say, which are famous quotesbut what they did not speak about is on “finding the address” to reach the endpoint. I have problems. Of course we all have, but I am speaking about “addressseekers” & “address providers”, yeah “idhe. illi khanditha ondu samasyeidhe” situation.

So many(read all) address seekers, stop their vehicles in the “middle” of the road allof a sudden!! Hello losers, kindly show hand signal & stop, halt at the extremeleft side of the road, & ask someone around. Its not that you find people& you just stop, no! You park your car, get your ass off the vehicle &ask the address. That’s how it works

& what’swith people, who halt thier vehicle, won’t even bulge from the driver’s seat;yell at top of their voice “24^th main yel baruthe”. Idiot, shouldthe person doing you the favor come near you, smile, say hi & tell you theaddress? Why being so lazy?

Next worstset of people are the ones who stop at the signal light & ask address. Onesat the left are a little ok ok, but there are ones who are at the middle of theroad, asking someone next to them which way to go, when the signal turns greenthereby blocking the entire traffic behind them.

Too muchworst are the ones who horn, & horn like crazy from behind, & if when youleave way, over take & come by your window (still driving remember) &ask the address. They totally freak me out. So stupid, it’s like they want totravel in the108 free ambulance & for that we will do anything idea. Youdie, why kill us?

If you arelost, almost going to die, & there is just one lady who could tell you theaddress & save you, still don’t. Never ask “a woman” address, period. Mikidhunimge biTidhu.

In Chennai,actually in TN, if they say, go straight & take a right, then left, thenleft, you do the opposite. You go straight, take left, then right & againright. Voila, you will reach perfectly. But if you make a mistake of followingwhat they say, you could be looping; that too infinite.

You hear tothe address & never watch. As in hear the directions but never see wherethe hand moves, it will surely confuse you. The person says “take right” &bends his hand towards left. Always. So just stick to the oral way.

It’s a no-riskto ask the auto drivers, provided yours & his vehicles share the same stateregistration number. If your vehicle number says “KA” and his auto numberstarts with “TN”, you are gone. It’s like Guindy flyover. Round & round& round, uff thale suthu.

Also nevergo near a bus stop, where there is a huge crowd yelling the place you wanna go “BangaloreBangalore Bangalore”. Chances that they might think, you are putting seat toyour car & ask “200 saaar, please drop me” (Personal experience err not mePati’s)

Then thereare certain awesome people, who when asked address say “follow me” & takeyou there. They have taken “help strangers” advice from their teachers atnursery a bit too seriously.

Oh got a call, someone calling to ask address. Ta

BabyB

2011-11-16T15:33:00.001+05:30

IT’S A GIRL!!!!!! :- ))))) - tweeted Abhishek. & thus started the paparazzi!!

Of the tiny soul, that doesn’teven know what lies ahead of it. It’s not even few hours old & has alreadybeen fed err force fed its share of love & hatred, both in equal quantities.

Information is wealth, yeah,but Indians need too much information. It’s a baby girl you tell, they wontcongratulate you instead as “How many kgs”, “Delivery was normal or C-section”yada yada. For all these years this is what their expectations were, &hence media, maniac media was born. They wouldn’t mind climbing trees, hittingpeople, creating a stampede to get visuals & footage, just to claim theyshowed it first err on TV. Exclusive is the new mantra.

Ever since this revolutionhappened, people are force fed with news, & now they don’t like it (atleast people I know with); they crib on how channels are funny on breakingnews.

I say, everyone is in astate of confusion, no one actually knows what they want. When we get less wethrive for more, when we get more we vomit.

P.P.S: Wishing the mother,best of motherhood & father, err sleepless nights.

P.S: Hello mr.ACP (not mydad) yes I know you are a proud Indian, so am I! This is just a write-up :- )

BadkoLo Body

2011-11-15T14:50:00.001+05:30

P.S: November post errstrictly Kannadigas only. Rest wouldn’t understand

No pa, this is not a post onJayalalitha/Karunanidhi/TamilNadu/KaveriNammadu. This is about a person whoneeds no introduction. But still I will take the ಕಷ್ಟ.He started his career as a sweeper err actor in some random movie, then startedhis “not-so- ಹಿತವಚನಾ” on ನಮ್ಮ ಅನಿತಕ್ಕನ್ channel. Then collected money in the name of some ಹೋಮ, got kicked out of the channel, joined ಸುವರ್ಣ & now is in zee ಕನ್ನಡ . The famous "Body ಭ್ರಾಮಾಂಡ", yeah Narendra Babu Sharma a.k.a known as "Dumma"

See initially when the show started he sat on a single chair, then they had to get him those ಮದುವೆ ಮನೆ bride-groom chair, now he fills completely into those wedding reception sofas, next I guess ಶಾಮಿಯಾನ-ನೇ ತರಬೇಕು.

He was the pioneers in the "ಜನರ ಕಣ್ಣಿಗೆ ಮಣ್ಣು ಎರಚುವ" ಆಟ. He said "Keep a lemon in a glass of water & place it in the entrance of your home", if the immersed lemon goes up & floats then that means ನಿಮ್ ಮನೆಗೆ ಯಾರೋ ಕೆಟ್ಟ ದೃಷ್ಟಿ people visited. It was a revolution. Every other home did this, including the shops, hospitals & what not. Oh bars too (someone who goes to the bar said)

Next he said that he told the Reliance industries "ಮನೇಲಿ silver ಗೂಬೆ" ಇಡೋದಕ್ಕೆ. You should have seen the market it created to those small time goldsmiths, I remember ನಮ್ ಅಮ್ಮ ordered for one owl & it took 3 months for delivery. Apparently having owl in the puja-room will expand the heritage.

He wants ಹೆಂಗಸರು of the house to wake up at 3am. ಸ್ನಾನ ಮಾಡಿ, ಸೀರೆ ಉಟ್ಟು, ತಲೆ ಬಾಚಿ, ಹೂವ ಇಟ್ಟು, ಬಾಗಿಲು ತೊಳೆದು, ರಂಗೋಲಿ ಹಾಕಿ, ದೇವರ ಮನೆ ದೀಪ ಹಚ್ಚಿ, ನಮಸ್ಕಾರ ಮಾಡಬೇಕು. All this within 5am.

He wants ಗಂಡಸರು of the house to wake up at 5am (2hours extra sleep wow). ಸ್ನಾನ ಮಾಡಿ, you cannot go to puja-room directly with ಸುತ್ತಿರೋ towel, change to ಮಡಿ clothes, do ಪೂಜೆ then ask your wife to fall to your feet, tell ದೀರ್ಘ ಸುಮಂಗಲಿ ಭವ & then you can have ಕಾಫಿ.

& if your wife serves you coffee in nighty, throw it on her face. Coffee: to be consumed only if wife is wearing ಸೀರೆ. Oh ho, if you are making coffee to your wife means ಅಷ್ಟೆ , ಅವನ ಬೈಗುಳ will make sure you get ರಕ್ತ from your ears.

Oh someone also said, he has done some special puja, to all who scold him, I think I should stop. Please watch his program for more information (I am sure you wont)

College - Work - Marriage - Kids - Life

2011-11-11T15:49:00.001+05:30

Just fewyears ago the discussions in friends circle was “Oh yel kelsa maadtidhya?”, “Howis the pay?”, “Onsite opportunities idhya”. & these days it’s just “Itsbaby girl” “How many kgs talks” . I obviously can’t say “Yeh sab kaise huapatha hi nahi chala”, coz its science, its nature, I know, even you shouldknow.

So after TT,Komi has become a mom, to a lovely baby girl.

New genchicks have arrived.

I amalready dreaming about attending these kiddo’s marriages. *wipes tears*

For furtherblogpost references the kiddos will be names, “Ruju” (TT’s) & “PunKo” (Komi’s)

I hearthat Ruju wakes up whenever I call TT (excuse me, TT knows that cell phoneshould be in silent mode, that’s not the point). Even when the phone rings inthe silent mode, she wakes up. We see a bondage here already.

Oh the boysin the gang are little lagging behind, (yeah blame the government for keepingmarriage age of boys a little higher). Both the Ganeshas have let go their bhramacharya& are engaged. One is getting married in Dec & the other in March. Yesyour congratulations will be delivered, gifts would have been better.

In other IMPORTANTnews, myself & Dummu are visiting the mothers, clicking photos of the kiddos, are publishingto everyone. This is by far the closest we got in terms of “Jana Seve”. I seethat no one who saw the pic even made an attempt to say “thanks for the pics”,they are just busy “awwwwww’ing”

P.S: DummuI am so tempted to write about *that*

Being Angry cannot wait

2011-11-03T17:07:00.002+05:30

Hello world,

I am back from a refreshing speedy holiday. Witnessing M.Sc racelive was the highlight & of course the only reason I was at the debutIndian GP, detailed report on it later.

Before that need to put what happened on our flight backhome; there was a guy next to me, dressed all corporate, and looking damnrestless. The seat-belt sign & no use of electronic appliances were stillon. & the moment air-hostess announced it can be used, he hurried, took hislaptop from the cabin, switched on.

Otherwise am a non-intrusive person, I am the one who keepsmom & Pati’s comments of people at bay, but this guy’s impatience made mecurious. I wanted to know what on world couldn’t wait for 15mins.

So the laptop was on, & you know what he did? Startedplaying “Angry Birds”!!! what is this world coming to bhawaan?

One Fire, Different Flames.

2011-10-26T14:21:00.001+05:30

Extracts from someone’s diary

I think I was 2 when it caught my eyes. It was bright & moving left & right. Mom was making too many of them, all placed in the tray. I tried going near & dad pulled me back, he was yelling at the top of his voice. I hardly understood elders those days; it was just the orientation of the voice. If they sounded soft, meant they were being mushy, if they sounded loud, it meant I wasn’t supposed to do whatever I tried few seconds back! Ya, so that was the first time I saw that thing.

Next time I saw it I could recognize its color, it was yellow, and I was 4 then. Also understood that I wasn’t supposed to go near it; Benki, was its name.

Few years later, while I watched neighboring kids burst crackers I realized mom wasn’t around. What was around were the deepas, brightly lit. I observed it for sometime; I loved the way it danced, with the wind, I’d seen dad hold his hands around it while ma lighted. I did the same. The dancing stopped & I was happy.

I was bursting crackers the next year, all grown up & proud of holding a “plain-not-chaT-chaT-sursurbathi”. That was also the year when I tried touching it. Like how curiosity killed the cat, it burnt my finger. I was glad though, no homework for 2 weeks.

Few years passed, & I was careful while handling it. One particular year, was I 10, not too sure, I decided I have to touch it & also not burn myself. I asked this younger cousin of mine, he wasn’t too sure; we tried the “taking-mangaLarti” style, didn’t burn but also didn’t touch. That’s when the adventurer within me awoke; I swiped my forefinger through the flame, as fast as I could. Nothing happened. I became my cousin’s hero that day.

Years passed & I was assigned with the task to light them. That also when I told my aunt not to waste match sticks, light a deepa & use it to light rest.

Few more years later they married me off. You are lakshmi of the house, light the deepa, our house & our lives too, told MIL. I giggled with the thought of lighting the house, I mean setting house on fire.

A year later, phone rang at midnight. Your husband is no more, told the caller. 24hours later, I saw benki engulf him. He did not move, & the fire hovered. 5 minutes & it was over.

100s of deepas in the front yard meant celebration, just one meant sorrow. I gazed at the deepa again, it was not just yellow, and that was just the edges, bright red in the middle & slowly the color faded.

You took away our son, echoed around the house since then. MIL managed to tell everyone who came by, even the maid. Unlucky was what they called me. Next I knew I was poured kerosene, one flick & boom.

Attention, Curiosity, Adventure, Sharing, NewLife, Life, Death - One Fire, Different Flames.

Of sperms & eggs

2011-10-24T15:43:00.001+05:30

I wanted to title this post as “Of Parenting” but then why not give credit to the ones that actually change the status of a couple, to parents, so “Of sperms & eggs”

There are n number of books on “Parenting” in the market, buying them & reading them doesn’t make you a good parent. These books are more like “salt to taste”, “add chilly according to your taste buds” recipes. It’s a gamble, you get them right first time, sometimes not, you learn every day, right from the tricks to treats, & as Aamir Khan says “every child is different”.

We have a pediatrician in the house who counsels adolescent kids, mostly the ones who are entering teens. According to him, more than the kids the parents need counseling. Being an eye witness & victim of an incident yesterday, I am now sure it’s true.

According to what I saw, Parents these days cannot stand their kids cry, the moment their child lets out a tear they go to any extent & fix it. What they do not fix is asking the child to shut up & stop the tears. Over the years, life is going to throw all sorts of stones at them, should they sit & cry on that? Instilling confidence is the first lesson you teach your kid. You don’t need a book to teach that isn’t it?

Life is not about getting married & having a kid before people start bombarding questions, but it’s about knowing that for the rest of your life, every good & decision your child makes, you are directly responsible for that. By the way you raised them, by the way you behaved with them, and by the way you taught them how to solve a problem. I have committed smallest mistakes to biggest blunders in life, & yes my parents are accountable to why I did that. & that is the same accountability I will be giving my kid, whenever that happens. The day I realize I can handle that, is when I decide to fertilize the egg. Period!

Anyways, serious stuff apart, today it’s all about parents, wishing new parents in town guRU & theJU, all the best on their 4kg bundle of joy, their signature i.e. “Ru-Ju” arrived today. More after meeting her.

Happiness is......

2011-10-21T19:11:00.000+05:30

Myself, music & walk in the misty mornings
Giving 2secs missed calls to mom mostly when she is cleaning
Random thoughts and creativity pop-ups
Noodles, funny sitcom & not-studying sister
Not on phone & at home dad
New dishes & never-complaining Pati
Talks about e-family with K-swamy
Boti palya on mahalaya amavasya
Grandpa wishing “huttu habbadha shubhashayagaLu”, yes in Kannada on the B’day.

That’s 9items on the list, & I don’t even believe on that number, anything? anything?Oh wait..

P.S: Howcan I forget, Me, You, Rides & Latitude

How it all started

2011-10-18T14:52:00.000+05:30

Hmm so you celebrate your birthday every year aa? All happy happy khush khushi-li, distributing chocolates, wearing new dress, blowing candles, cutting cakes, visiting temples, throwing parties & what not; good. But have you ever thought the origin of all this?

Ayyo ayyo not the intercourse part, but the fact about what was the main reason you got out of your mom? Yes we are discussing about pain, “its-time-for-the-baby-to-pop-out-pain”.

While sister grumbled on various instances, she went on night shift just to witness a delivery & no preggie ladies got the pain, mom started her story. “When I was pregnant with you”, she looked in my eyes.

“Eh what did you do as soon as the water broke?” I asked.

Being the typical Monica of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, having cleanliness OCD, first thing she did was take a hot bath it seems. WTH, myself & sis exclaimed.

“Doctors actually advise to pour hot water on tummy, so I thought you never know the kind of water they have in the hospital, sterilized or not. So why not take bath”

See. My mother is such a psycho. There I was, wanting to come out of her belly, see the world, bless everyone with my presence & all she thought was having bath. I guess that’s when I decided, I should seldom have bath.

Then, what happened, sis asked.

“Myself & your grandma, we walked all the way to hospital” she said.

Kindly do not give an OMG, 9 month in pain lady walks to hospital aa, what was the father doing look. It’s just that our house was hardly 500mts from hospital, so it’s obvious that she walked.

& then the doctor gave her fast-pain inducing injections every hour starting from 7pm till 11pm. I am sure I was still pissed off with bath issue that I refused to bulge out. I must have decided “ee vomma is mad only, if I am out wonder how many times she will give me bath” anta. By then the clock stroked 12, date was 30/03, being a palindrome obsessed, and I was out.

Normal delivery is like punarjanma to women, mom sighed. Sis agreed. She even told about two deaths she saw during the delivery time. While we are discussing this, the lovely TT is waiting for the pain, it’s been quite some time, poor soul, that kiddo is sure testing her patience. I wanted to suggest what happens when Rachel doesn’t get the pain, but considering the amount of tube light she is, gave it a pass.

I think I’ll just adopt a kid.

That moment

2011-10-14T17:57:00.000+05:30

He looked in her eyes, for the first time. She didn't.

"Look at me jaan", he said.

She giggled.

"Nope, its too weird", she continued giggling.

"You are just scared"

"Of what? Excuse me, I am not"

"Then why? Look at my eyes"

"OK fella. Bring it on"

The Who-blinks-eyelid-first-battle started.

& somewhere in between the fight, it happened.

"that moment"

Food: Kerala Lime Tea

2011-10-13T18:29:00.001+05:30

If you are a foodie, this should be your bible, post-meals. It digests food instantly, the right amount of sweetness & sourness is the key, also makes room for that dessert you skipped coz you were full.

In simple words, you could be Joey of Thanksgiving where he eats an entire turkey. If you have a glass of Kerala Lime Tea, that is.

This is what you’ll need for 2 people

Water – 2 glasses

Sugar – 3 table spoons

Lemon extract – 1 table spoon

Tea powder – ½ table spoon

This is how you make it

Boil water & sugar, the longer the better.

When boil starts to thicken, add tea powder & switch off stove. The tea powder is just for the color & a slight texture.

Add lemon & sieve.

Well, you could serve or drink on your own. Yes both the glasses that you made, thank you!

Mother India - Bharathi

2011-10-11T17:41:00.001+05:30

Bharu,

47years huh??

Of being a naughty daughter during childhood & supportive daughter when grandma/grandpa lost their son.

Of being a happy sister, throwing akshathe during bro’s engagement & putting akki kaaLu during bro’s death.

Of being a lovey-dovey girl friend of a young hot-tempered guy since childhood, taking care of still hot-tempered man during mid-life crisis and raising two lovely daughters with still hot-tempered husband.

Of being a mom of two totally weird souls, both different physically/emotionally/psychologically & balancing between biased accusations.

Of being amma to no-talks-always-shy-aLiya and now non-stop-chit-chats aLiya.

Of being a responsible elder daughter in law of a still-together family of 25

Of being mentor, guide, agony aunt to everyone inside & outside the household.

Of being news feeder to all the no access to live news people

Of being a humble mistress to all the maids in the house

You have done it all. It isn’t that easy, not easy at all.

It is that enthusiasm. That urge to know everything that’s happening around. You make sure you seek interest in all our interests, so that you are always in conversation.

It is that diplomacy. That ability to solve conflicts between people. You make sure everyone around is at peace.

It is that patience. That ability to handle dad with ease. Everyone who knows dad will definitely agree without any doubt.

All the above are what you we all adore you for Bharu.

You must be wondering what I am not addressing you as “miiii”. That’s because this letter is about what an amazing person you are irrespective of being my mother.

Happy Birthday from all of us whose lives you have touched.

Always stay the same, same as Monica from F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

P.S: Yes, soon.

Film: Paramaathma

2011-10-07T17:31:00.001+05:30

Two pre-conditions before you go to watch “Paramaathma”

Puneeth is not Ganesh is not Diganth

Paramaathma Yograj is not Pancharangi Yograj is not MungaaruMale Yograj

OK you are good now, you can go. Except if you want to hear my review.

Time & again I have realized one thing about hyped movies. They just fail. Fail & how, miserably. What I have also realized is I never give up hope. That one day a much hyped movie will make it, to the blockbuster category.

The Story

1. Puneeth is “Param” a.k.a “Teddy” a.k.a “KaraDi” who fails M.Sc 5 times (not sure why), who climbed graphical Everest & planted a flag (not sure why), then went to Bombay made friends with yeLneeru guy who gave him tips so he makes money (not sure why), then becomes fat, someone asked him to learn Kung-Fu so he goes to China to learn (not sure why), then gets philosophical goes to Nepal, asks “yeh life kaiku?”, they give him one bidhirina dabba attached with enema tube sorts something, allaDisu & this is your answer they say, he does many times & we hear rumbling sound (not sure why errr also what) who is now telling story to “Paseena Paseena” a.k.a Aindritha Roy which she already knows.

2. In the story, entry AnathNag, who is a cardiologist who checks whether his son Param’s heart is the same since he was born? Yes magane, yes, he yells most of the times having a squirrel in his hand (not sure why)

3. Param has 5 more dubaaku friends who just help in his dialogue delivery; oh they have dubaaku names also like “muthaidhe”, “kaDlebeLe” array bere I forgot.

4. Param meets Deepa in a movie theatre; both of them fall asleep while the movie is on, just like Pati did while Paramaathma was going on. Bomb scare, friends almost pinch Param but he doesn’t wake up (not sure why), but when called on his cell phone he wakes, he is running out & sees Deepa sleeping, wakes her & says “Bomb”, she starts running in opposite direction of the exit (not sure why), her leg gets struck to one chair, Param cant leave onTi girl so breaks chair & now she cant run, so lifts her & gets her out. Media calls them “PremigaLu”

5. Avinash a.k.a Deepa’s dad is unhappy. Her 7 instruments barsing daughter’s maana is harajed. Param & his dad also aren’t happy so they go visit Deepa’s house, ask sorry, she is building one model house which Param gets home along with her visiting card.

6. Param calls “Thithi VaDe” a.k.a Deepa everyday & she cancels “Nusi PeeDe” a.k.a Param’s call everyday (not sure, hello I know this, Love start adke)

7. One fine day, Param clicks Deepa’s picture during her concert & she gets distracted, & her dad smacks her, sends her off to haLLi (not sure why)

8. Param follows her, sings one song in the journey and reaches her home even before she does (not sure how) Oh also kisses her in random on her cheeks

9. Start Deepa uncontrollable laughter (not sure why) to such an extent that it gets on audiences nerves.

10. He kisses her again, sleeps on her lap, she assumes he is asleep, kisses him on his cheeks whole night, run some mud race with she biting him(not sure why), then elders agree & they are ready to get married

11. Entry Paseena Paseena, karaDi song, I want you I want you scenes, He saying No You cant No You cant scenes, she crying & leaving Param. Deepa watching & saying “you can hurt her means you can hurt me also, go I don’t want you” scenes

12. Param coming home & starts building home that she built as model, meanwhile Deepa comes back after viraha & marriage happens. Then start Param laughing uncontrollably (not sure why)

13. Baby happens (not sure, array marriage ke baad what else will happen) & baby calls appa first, they are happy again, they sleep with baby on tree house, then Deepa dies. Too much happiness will lead to heart attack says cardiologist.

14. Paseena Paseena is wiping tears now after story over, she is marrying someone else, Param is taking care of baby.

The End.

Why is this movie so bad? Yavanig Gothuuuuuuuuu.

Yuwaaaaaah Dasara 2011

2011-10-04T13:00:00.001+05:30

One of those back home early, what to do situations yesterday & we decided why not witness “Yuva Dasara 2011”. It was Udit Narayan who was performing & Pati didn’t even know how he looked. I told him “looks doesn’t matter, it’s his uncle voice that’s famous. MTV Subbulakshmi ge & Kunidhu Kunidhu bare gothilwa. Let’s go” & we went.

By the time we reached the venue, it was full. Thanks to mom & sis & their two kerchiefs, we had chairs. The MCs were yelling at the top of their voice, I guess they forgot the whole functionality of the mikes. That’s when I started missing cotton; my ears shouted “Pain Pain”.

Just when I comforted my ear, my nose started the trouble. There was booze all around. It was the samithi guys, they were totally drunk. There is no point in having security checks at the entrances, they could have alcoholmeter instead. Next to mom sat a paDDe huDga, who got excited every time lights blinked, music started, MCs spoke, participants dances, well basically he never sat still, got up & danced like a maniac, he wanted the camera to focus him, he even made calls to someone complaining he wasn’t being focused. Mom sat at the edge of her chair, not excited but he was dancing like a weirdo. This happened at the second row mind you, the VVIP stand. I wonder how these porkis get access to such passes.

The dances happened. Only act that was mesmerizing was a number from SDM MMK College, they performed Ramayana with utmost grace. Rest, not worth discussing!!! Apparently all the dance programs were done & it was 8:00pm, no trace of Udit Narayan. These MCs had no script for fillers, I am sure they didn’t even know what filler was. Then they started to keep the audience at bay by singing songs, & mental audience danced even at MCs songs.

& then came the troop, they were supposed to be best musicians from Delhi. They just did one thing, killed music. If Gurukiran heard the song, he would have taken one MCs dupatta & hanged himself. They were that bad. It was 8:35pm & one Radio Jockey from Rainbow started the show with “Mysoruuuuuuu hegide?” The monitors displayed “Do You Rock”, sis said “No I roll you idiots. The songs are making my tears roll”.

She wore noodle strap salwar, & the bayyys were least bothered what she spoke. Then started the show at 8L45pm, with some random singer who sang “Neele Neele ambar”, he was good. Better than Udit, anytime. Then there was some SaReGaMaPa Rokthima girl. It was 9pm & still no sign was Udit.

Then started “PaPa Kehthe Hai”, Udit was out but wasn’t singing. Loser was lip syncing. & for the rest of the songs that he sang, whichever involved taking a high pitch, he never sang. Like it wasn’t “Jadoooooo teri Nazar Khushbooooo tera badan” but it was “Jadu teri nazar Khushbu tera badan”. Get the point?

Well Well the worst was yet to come. After a few hindi songs, the crowd strated yelling Kannada Kannada & he sang “MTV Subbulakshmi ge”. Even the porki who was still dancing would have sung that much better. Isn’t that obvious when he is performing in Karnataka, he has to rehearse the song at least once. The music was bad, so was his pronunciation and the raaaga. Then came the shocker, “Kunidhu Kunidhu Baare”, it kole. Kannada dha kole. I have seen Kunal Ganjawaala’s show, Hariharan’s show, Shreya Goshal’s show, none this bad. Everyone had done their homework with few Kannada songs that they planned to sing. They are just wasting money, our money.

Get Vijay Prakash, Get Raghu Dixit, Get M.D.Pallavi, better still get the budding singers, audience don’t need big stars, they just need entertainment, & they are Kannadigas, they will embrace any form of talent, even if its low profile.

Dining Table Tales

2011-09-28T12:41:00.001+05:30

You all should stop judging police. That they are pot bellied, drink, smoke, play cards and aren’t fit. That’s not the truth; that’s so not the truth. Have you seen my dad? He is fit like a boy in his teens & of course he doesn’t do any of those good habits. I even heard someone tell him, “Ni yentha Police, yav keTTa abyasanu illa, hogLi police bhashenu upyogsalla”

Staying fit is probably his only motto in life. Oh wait, I forgot to mention, he is a veggie. Yeah you heard that right, veggie Gowda. I guess when I told the same Pati almost fainted. & for fitness his regime consists of 5kms run in the morning & 2kms in the evening.

Here is the diet *burrpppp* eh this mutton saaru, excuse me

7am – a glass of bottleguard juice + a bowl of papaya

8:30am – no rice item, no coconut oriented breakfast

11am – tender coconut

1pm – mudhe + saaru, a bowl of rice & a dry vegetable palya

4pm – a glass of pomegranate juice

8:30pm – a bowl of boiled vegetables, chapathi/roti along with a palya

9pm – Neer Majjige

No milk, no coffee, no tea, no sweets, no snacks, no chakli, no koDbaLe, well well NO LIFE

With rest of the family its chicken for breakfast, mutton for lunch & fish for dinner. Oh we also fit some prawns in between. Except Vatti who tries to have everything with a spoon & fails miserably.

P.S: What’s in ahara meLa this time huh?

Bon anniversaire

2011-09-26T17:46:00.001+05:30

& I am happy again; wasn’t I till now you might question. I was, can’t deny that, but this happiness is magical, not laughing hard sorts happiness, its that muguLu nage sorts happiness, that smile you steal when you are alone or even when there are tons of people around, for no reason, yeah that sort of happiness.

I am back to being myself again. That mental girl who was lost somewhere between 2008 till now, trying to change, adapt to people around, letting go her identity of psychic enthusiasm, yo she is back.

All thanks to Hassle-Free conversations!!! & this post had to be published today, on the date that has been part of the passwords these days, an ode to Edison; with the invention of light bulb he lighted everybody’s life, especially mine.

When RED

2011-09-25T14:52:00.001+05:30

Is when we stop. Yes, that's right, that's when we stop at the junction. But in those 120-180secs what do you do?

Do you just wait?
Do you talk with people whom you are with?
Do you buy things that they sell there? Earbuds, wiping cloth, flags et el?
Do you listen to music?
Do you raise your window pane when beggars ask money?

I look. Look, not stare. I look at passengers in the auto. I see couple in the car & see if they are waiting. I watch anxiety in the eyes of not helmet wearing two wheelers. I look, observe.

Thats what I do.

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Lux Kya Scene Hai

2011-09-23T17:55:00.000+05:30

Top 3 Bollywood situations that leads to (at least they think) getting laid.

In no particular order

Hero & Heroine together are washing car/bike, & out of blue heroine decides to throw water on the hero. Hero is all wet; he yells “array rukh tujhe dikha tha hoon (Huh? Hame bhi tho dikhao)” & chases the heroine who by now is indoors, actually bedroom. He gets her & start music (imagine Sharukh playing virtual piano in KKHH during rain sequence in summer camp) & tadaaa it happens
Heroine has dreadful cold & the couple is far away from the reach to doctors. She is shivering, & will die if there is no sufficient heat provided & our hero has no other go but to heat her, start music (high pitch drums banging) & tadaaaa it happens
Sharaab. This sure is only situation close to reality, but silly directors’ use as part of comedy phase of the movie. Take DDLJ for that matter, “Senorite, tum nashe mein thi aur mein bhi apne aap ko rokh nahi paaya, aur bas samkjo sab kuch hogaya”.

Check & Checkmate

2011-09-22T13:16:00.001+05:30

It’s been a while since this happened. When Kannada movies drained our energy levels to a very horrible extent, we found peace with Rangayana’s Checkmate. The tickets are priced 30 bucks, which according to me is very less. The amount of hard work that goes in coming up with such plays is not even 1% comparable to what the tickets are priced.

Checkmate is a Marathi play, later translated to Hindi & to Kannada by Dr. Thippeswamy. Its funny and equally sit-at-edge-of-your-seat sorts; 3 characters, Nachiketh, Nandini & Satyasheel Satya take you to an exciting journey of emotions for two and half hours. & I wasn’t tempted once to have a look at my phone while the play was on, which explains the amount of awesomeness of the act.

Of all the 3 characters, it was the inspector who stole the show. He is shabby, yet disciplined, he looks horrible still woos the audience, his way of modulating emotions, the way he sips whiskey I don’t mind watching it again coming Sunday just for him. Of course Pati would resent.

The play is running last show this Sunday at Bhoomigeetha, RangayaNa 6:30pm. Do watch it & fall in love with theatre and Satyasheel Satya.

Challenging alla Chillare

2011-09-15T18:02:00.000+05:30

Heights; today I saw on TV that some girl, handicapped, who is fasting for Darshan & his bail speak.

Media: Alla Drashan navru avar wife mele halle maadidaralla, still you want him to get bail and come out?

Stupid girl: Yen avru obrena hoDedirodhu? All men beat women ala?

WTF is wrong with these people? WTF is wrong with media? WTF is wrong with Nikitha? WTF is wrong with Ramya? WTF is wrong with Ambarish? WTF is wrong with Vijayalakshmi? WTF is wrong with Darshan?

Funny-Fans

Do you even have something called brains? Visiting a temple and performing homa for the welfare of the guy? & you pujari what the hell were you thinking while uttering paTa paTa manthra? These fools should be shot dead, from Darshan’s loaded gun only. & amma taayi who is fasting for the star, you are nothing but hore for your parents, & for the world.

Mental-Media

The moment there is a story, you run. Run like how the dogs run in the midnight behind the vehicles. You chase, you re-run the 5 sec clip again and again and again. You circle the star, point with arrow and write in bold letters “It’s him”. Yes we all know how he looks like, but do you have to show him at that junction & say, this is how he looks after beating his wife? How I wish, instead of hitting wife, he hits you. Oh wait, the lawyers did hit you alla no? Serves right!

Naachike-illadha-Nikitha

Yenamma, bandhya kelsa maadidhya, mathe vapas hogbeku. Leave your wife; leave your kid, idella beka ninge? & if you have the guts that you seriously have nothing with that guy, and then bloody come to Karnataka, call the media and tell the same. Stop taking calls, talking fake Kannada and then run to hospital quoting BP. Don’t you think you will get better wood than Sandalwood, & hotter man than challenging star? Why you being a cry baby?

Yuva-Congress-Candidate-Ramya

Wah. You only speak Kannada, for such things no? Like when you are in pain or need votes. I agree that you were banned for wrong reason, I am sure everyone backed you with that injustice those producer losers did, but where were you when wife was beaten black & blue. Why didn’t you commit on the injustice. Actress ban andha takshna comment-aa? So only actresses are women? Wives of stars aren’t?

Hello-Mandyadha-Gandu-Ambarish

Oh men beating women is common? Son beating mother is common? Let’s see you produce a movie having scenes like that. Jana meTTu tagondu hoDitaare, arrey movie yella yaake, just touch your wife Sumalatha and check out if she is ok with it.

Challenging-alla-Chillare-Darshan

Nodu bad time start aadre hinge, it never seems to stop. SangoLLi Ranyanna hogi Jaillalli RamayaNa agoithu. If you have so much chaTa why the hell did you have to marry someone? It’s nothing but sahavaasa dosha, Ambi? Duniya Viji? & the best thing your mom did was to get all the property in the name of wife. Of all the things burning wife with cigarette, I mean seriously? Hitting with slippers? My ears bleed the moment I listen such stuff. This is not even domestic violence. Its wild violence. & after this entire episode if that lady has agreed to take back the complaint, then kudos to her. Wish it was “alle draw alle bahumaana” man.

Vijayalakshmi

The day I saw you, you were just married, young, tiny, phaLa phaLa & all that bride kaLe. When I met you in Dodappa’s house with Vineesh, you were nothing but sophisticated no-ego star’s wife. I don’t think anyone has the right to tell you about what you need to do. It is totally your life & yes only you have control on it. If you let go this time, ninge chippe gathi. You really should have stood by “ban Nikitha or I won’t take complaint vapas” decision. Even if he spares you, the fans won’t. They are nothing but cheap mass. Take Care

P.S: ayyo ayyo my favorite car is now anatha in Vijayanagar Police Station.

Mobile Blogging

2011-09-15T13:57:00.001+05:30

Ah there I go, blogging from my new mobile. Samsung Galaxy I9003. Wooo Hoooo

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Kaup Light House

2011-09-08T10:52:00.001+05:30

The last time I and Pati were there they had no access to the Light House. This time we could go up the tall tower, Pati kept teasing me how I would freak out when I saw the world from that height; yeah I am damn scared of heights, so much that I refuse to look outside the window in my first flight. We went up, through the circular stairs, and finally a steep row of stairs had to be climbed to reach the place where they have the optical illuminant.

I was more excited to watch the sea from the top; Pati was holding my hand already. The moment we went out, the winds pushed us; it was one helluva of a wind. It was like that moment when Kate climbs on the edge of titanic and opens her arm, Jack asks her to trust him & feel the wind.

“I am flying Jack”, she says

Yeah that. I witnessed it, just that the kiss didn’t happen, too much crowd and my man is against PDA.

I could see the sea kissing a silver lined cloud, at the farthest end. It was blue all over, the waters and the sky, with a little difference in the color. I am sure any painter would love to put it on his canvas; I just captured that scene in the eye.

I touched the light of the light house, wondering how many lives it has saved till date. If you are traveling along the highway, & its post 6:45pm, the revolving light is one of the best things you can witness, just make sure the driver watches the road and not the light. The man, who sat near the aperture, let me take the pics which otherwise is prohibited. He also explained how it works!

This goes into my “unforgettable location” list.

Oh Maina Oh Maina..

2011-08-29T16:14:00.000+05:30

It was summers of March, 2011. One friend of mine had suggested we visit the Sukhna Lake, not that it was extraordinary but he insisted we have “Sukha Bhel” near the entrance. While I munched on my independent “Sukha Bhel” & Pati on his (basically in laws shared his bhel), the moon watched me and the wind being nice, blew across my face. Basically there was no disturbance.

Just then one aunty and her in 30s daughter sat next to the bench I sat. They were speaking in “Kannada” assuming I wouldn’t understand. The 30s daughter also had a kid, 5yrs old which was playing in the kid zone. Both mother & daughter kept shouting, “hey Deeksha, jopana”. By then Pati had heard them speak in Kannada as well & he was all excited to find Kannadigas there. For me it’s no big deal & as much as I respect my privacy, I respected theirs and did not hear to what they spoke.

But they started talking nonsense; that how Kannadigas are stubborn and have no sense of pride. How she was a great actress & had to quit because her husband didn’t want her to. According to her, there are so many people in the other industries who have let their wives work. “Look at me, I was so happening in Gandhinagar”, she complained to her mom. Now that’s when I looked at her, after much effort to the brain I realized who she was. “Successful”, I almost ROFLed; she went on cursing so many producers, directors and actors. Now what irked me the most was when she spoke rubbish about Dodappa. I remember how she was chosen for the role in one of his movies, how much she had taken out of the movie, it was that movie that made anyone say she is “one” of the actresses, small big whatever.

My “Sukha Bhel” was almost over now, & by then, her mother asked me “Excuse me, where do you get the one you are eating”.

I said “Aunty, ille gate hathra siguthe” (you get them near the gate)

Oh the expression on their face was that of a life time. They were shocked that I spoke Kannada & had listened to the entire conversation.

Aunty finally spoke “Oh neevu Kannada-davara? We have come from Karnataka, with normal people. We thought we’ll see how it feels to be like normal, meet my daughter, you must know her, and she is an actress *A*”

“Howdha, which movie have you acted” I said.

Pati by then had smelled fire & took me off. Big actress it seems, she was bloody in one of those big buses that takes north India trip for 30 days, & even near the bus kept telling someone “Oh I hate it when people recognize me”.

Recognize, my foot. I didn’t feel like giving her a smile.

P.S: Her name is in the blog title, go figure it out!

Letter to Maama

2011-08-24T17:26:00.001+05:30

Nanna mudhu maama,

Yesterday I was talking with Pati about, oh wait, I haven’t introduced you to my Pati, yes maama your kid is all grown up now & handling a household (not technically but yeah). Meet Vinay, who is taking all my tantrums & yet doesn’t complain a bit, & maama you need no introduction to Pati. We talk about you all the time.

I tell him how you would come to my school at the end of every final exam to pick & take me straight to ajji mane. You would have also told ajji to make “gulab jamoons” & together we would eat after lunch. I remember how everyone were scared to wake you up during your afternoon nap, I would just pounce you, sit on your tummy and say “maama yedhLi” and you never yell at me. How can I forget you lifting me every time we went to chunchungiri for pooja? I was so proud of you when you quit smoking after your engagement with that lady.

You wouldn’t believe I still have all the audio cassette collections. The one you had numbered alphabetically and had the numbers written against the movie names on a sheet of paper. I had no idea that day, today it will be reserved as a memory, as your memory. If today I am called filmi, it’s all coz of you. Remember how you bunked work and we went first day first show for all the movies, Kannada/Hindi, some very good ones and some real crappy ones; these days its Pati who gets punishment with crap stuff.

We cleaned your room few months back, & I found “Badhukalu kaliyiri” book in your wardrobe. Did you really have to leave us after reading that book? Dad gets to hear a lot of stuff from me for that one mistake of his. That fault which did not let me get one last glimpse of yours. In his defense I was young, but today when I realize I wasn’t there at your cremation, it breaks me, rips me apart. How horrifying it would have been for your soul for not having me, your lovely sose, by your side while you bid farewell from the materialistic world.

I have done it quite a few times maama, doing it again, I am sorry. But I have been with ajji for the short span she was with us; always in your memories, weeping and sobbing for losing her jigar ka tukda. I have also yelled at ass relatives who suggested that grandpa should re-marry coz the son has been lost. & every time mom had nightmares I have been by her side too, consoling her that her brother is always around, never gone. About grandpa, I have no words, for what all he went through, he is doing great now. I am sure he still keeps thuthu in his plate for you & ajji. I think I’ll break now, I should stop.

Before I go, I’ll promise you that no matter what, your room and everything inside will be untouched. Even when we take a decision to alter the house. I know you rest there, in peace and in happiness.

Love,

Putti

Film: Jogayya

2011-08-23T15:49:00.001+05:30

Pre-condition: You should have watched Prem’s Jogi for going further down the review. If not, I say leave the space & come back another day.

Before I begin, it was much delight to see annavru in the prologue, the same scene where in Parvathamma puts akki to bogase of Jogi in the movie Jogi.

Sakkath Story Boss-u

Jogi alias Madesa is now in Mumbai, playing a normal kuri kaayonu in a household that has a taller than him heroine. He tries to act like Rajkumar at most of the places & fails. You see no one can be a Rajkumar, not even the sons. Most of the characters are repeated in this movie, like “bubayya, the muslim chacha” & that Oh-I-forgot-his-name guy. Meanwhile everyone is doing dhandha in the name of Jogi whilst he is romancing with the heroine. Prem has very intelligently taken the narration and kept the audiences in the tip of their chair just to know how this movie is actually connected to Jogi. Kudos for him to portray the current political scenario damn well to the Underworld story, this is one of the major highlights of the movie.

Characterization chillampilli Boss-u

Heroine swalpa tall for SRK but yet she is one of the strong points of the movie, it is she who gets Jogi freed, it is she who fights for him, it is she who also goes away when he she realizes he aint the guy she fell in love with. Pooja Gandhi, side alli sink agtiyallamma, I wonder how you manage to get every small part & make sure that you nibhaisu it well, & yeah that “appaNNa” guy, are you “Loose-maadha”’s brother or something. Whatever it is I am thoroughly impressed, you were much better than biDDa. & the one who played “Yeddy”, yappa total bang on. He looks the same and acts the same. RaviShankar does an exceptionally well enacting “Narendra Babu Dumma”.

Finally SRK, what can I say, you have proven me wrong, my every statement that made fun of you is maaf, just that one scene, the 1 minute one just before the climax, where in you wonder what the hell happened, you take that chapli and hit it to your heart twice, wah just feast to the eyes.

Daring Dance, Super songsu Boss-u

The opening song requires nothing but applause. Handling a team of 50+ and getting them in sync with Shivanna’s dance is itself a task and I don’t know the choreographer, you’ve made it look very pristine. So are rest of the songs, Oda ley is supposed to be 3D but theaters in Mysore didn’t have that so I’ll have to cut the review on that.

Thaglakonde by Uppi, take a bow. Its whacky, it says a lot of a man who has done 100 movies in Sandalwood and its peppy too.

Boss-u Gedhbitte Boss-u

The day I heard about “Preethi Yeke Bhumi Melidhe”, I had shed blood. That was the amount of hope I had on nam Mandya hudga. The day he married Gandbheeri Rakshitha, I knew he was gone. Nela kachidha prem I read when Raj the showman was a flop. But post this, man he is back and how? Full phoenix type-u

& for all the guys who are ranting about the movie being dumb, come on guys, enough of “Yograj Bhatt” type, Doodhpeda oriented movies. I am fed up of ade dialogues and ade rain, the macchu, longggu just made my day. Whistled my heart out, I am one of the happy audience.

Dums: Nod-dhe Nod-dhe Nodbardhanna Na Nod-dhe

2011-08-20T12:22:00.001+05:30

This goes way back in 2004, on one fateful morning when Dums was walking from hostel to the classes at the PS block.

It was wheezing problem Veena’s class. Myself, T and M were already in the respective places. The flowers Veena wore were as fresh as her just done make-up. She had almost started the class when Dums made an entry.

“Excuse me maam”, she said.

“Bega barakke agalwenri?” yelled Veena.

“Maam…..” there was a sense of smashaaNa mauna in the class, apart from we 3 giggling.

“Come in”

Within few minutes Dums settled in her place. I observed that she was sweating. I asked her to chill, “ley it’s just a class. Why so much tension” I wrote on the chit and passed.

This was our usual thing. We just didn’t make chits for internals but we had chits for every class. I think it was BSR who once said “Don’t you think I know that you gals chat in chits?” Yeah, we made sure we increased the intensity of the chit writing. Also we didn’t waste paper; every space the chit was thoroughly utilized. The amount of chits could araam se boil water for two days.

Coming back, she was still tensed. That’s when I knew something was wrong. I mean couldn’t imagine my close friend getting anxious about missing Veena’s class. Nah, Never!!!

I wrote “babes you all right? Yenaithu?” and passed the chit.

“@#$%^&*! My eys are bledin kaNe. sw smtn dt shouldn’t hv”, then it was passed to all the 3. Veena was shouting at someone by then and I couldn’t stop myself, I spoke.

“Will you please tell us, curiosity is killing us?” all 3 agreed. I am not sure about T though, she would be still wondering what the first line in the chit was, can’t blame her, she used to sit towards the side where the lecturers walked.

Following is the extract lifted from that chit (spelling mistakes are totally Dums fault, she is known for that)

D wrote “I ws comin twrds clas via PH block. Almst rchd PS block & 1 guy, he stood ther, hd removed his pant &…… “

We 3 didn’t have words, to talk or to write. For the next few minutes I think Veena’s voice was heard carefully, but with so many questions in our minds. By the time she started calling attendance; T also had understood and was in a state of shock.

We were hoping the next class which was of SG (I suppose) shouldn’t happen. It did and that too without a gap. We were struck again with chits. I couldn’t wait any longer.

I wrote “r u fine? He ws far right?”

Dums: S far. M Nt fine. I sw it L

M: L sorry dummu. Apne aap ko sambhalo

T: *silent*

Lunch that day was silent too. No one spoke; then again Dums broke the silence. “I think we should report this, few of the hostel gals were also complaining”, I agreed. I think it was T or M who denied, “sumne Y headache” they said.

That was spoken for few days and then forgotten. But 2 months later something really terrible happened. We were done with the internals on the 1^st floor and were coming down, that’s when all 4 of us saw him. He was doing the same, jerking himself.

T shrieked. And 4 of ran towards the cycle stand near the Nescafe. I called the security and said something which of course I don’t remember. & if you know about the security they were just bunch of losers, who knew just to whistle at students and couples and groups. Never ever did the real job of securing people.

So that security ran towards the place where all our hands were pointed to, but by then he ran away. Few even told us that he might be the gardener at the college. Whatever man, why show his garden to us? What ill had we done to witness such horrifying scene?

Like we were so scared that we screwed up our marks that sem, really!!

P.S: Thanks to Dums for allowing me to script this incident. You are a brave girl lady, I mean watching that twice, phew medal kodsbeku :D

Men!!!!

2011-08-19T12:45:00.000+05:30

Location: Presidency Golf Club, Mumbai

I woke up with a massive headache. People who are in virtual sites these days give nothing but headaches, yeah so the head was reeling. Pati was still sleeping like a log, so I being Typical Bharatiya Naari and all decided not wake him up.

I promptly picked up the intercom and called kitchen. It was 8am and yet none picked up. What fools they must have been. With so much efforts I got off bed and took these real dragging steps to reach the door (it was just a try to wake Pati up, he never bulged), I went to the reception and have a look at this conversation.

Me (rubbing eyes): Errrr Tea?

Some idiot at the reception: Madam, are you offering tea to me?

Me: K

How can someone be that cheesy?

Threads & Knots - 2

2011-08-18T19:01:00.001+05:30

Story till here

& it took lot of time to clean up the glass mess.

Joke apart, I don’t think he recognized me. But I did. Mihir was the brightest of all kids in school. I could trust my memory; we were classmates from 5^th till 9^th. He was one of those kids who sat in the front bench and by hearted syllabus page wise, like the “Vicki the robot” kinds.

I still remember Independence Day celebrations where I and Mihir hosted the show. That’s when I actually understood that the guy was not just about books, he had an amazing outlook towards life. Within no time we were best buds when the kids around started talking ill about us. I was just 15 then and totally freaked out, I even thought what if this remains a “kaLank” for the rest of my life. What if no one marries me, and then I would have no kids. Those days my ambition was to get married and have kids. Coming back, I decided to do it, to stop all the crap talks all I did was tie him rakhi & make him my rakhi brother. It shut everyone up at school.

Now if Mihir is my brother Mahantesh would be my brother too isn’t it? I called off the wedding and quoted the reason, my inner sense wouldn’t permit to do it. Not at all, so that was it, love story with a brutal ending.

P.S: Stop tying rakhis to every Tom, Dick and Harry. This could happen to you as well.

Threads & Knots - 1

2011-08-12T12:14:00.000+05:30

“Madam, aapke pakoras” yelled the stallwala.

Pakoras, according to me is the best thing to happen with rains. I mean hot coffee too, but nothing can beat the spicy *ssssss* *aaaa* taste during cold rainy season. Nothing!

In case you guys are wondering, yes I am having it all by myself. One plate completely. That’s me. I hate sharing food. & pakoras, oh oh no sir no. Never. Dot. Mumbai monsoons are like river Cauvery when she is 124.8ft. Yeah full. Not beautiful and calm so that you leave “baagiNa”, but with rain water clogged everywhere and muddy puddles and raincoats and umbrellas and autowaalas splashing water to pedestrians and ok you get the point.

On such a rainy day, while I having pakoras, I saw him. Not a TDH figure, but neat, crisp and dignified sorts, kinda like Aamir Khan having paani-puri and giving credit card instead of cash in “Ghajini”. Ah that way. & he saw me too. He saw me staring him. Must have thought who is this maal? coz I am a maal material. 5”4 tall, long hair with no lattt, fair-and-lovely applied skin, koeld eyes, small bottu, nude lipstsick, black umbrella having violet flowers, no high heels. If you think that doesn’t classify a “maal” type, then to hell with you.

& like the Bollywood movie, we started seeing each other. In that pakoras stall. For some time we never spoke. I think it was me who initiated, “Do you have change”, and I asked him. Shameless of me, but what the heck, also so stupid of him not to have the change; then the meetings shifted a little higher, where there was a chath a.k.a roof. We were like the kaathe-peethe couple.

Like every couple fresh in love, it was talks and talks and chats and chats. Oops I think I forgot to introduce my self to you all. I am “Neenu”, array not Upendra’s movie character, parents actually named me “Neenu”. If you have any problem, go ask them. Except that you cant, coz I will not give you my address. His name “Mahantesh”, correct not “Rahul” or “Prem” or “Sameer”.

We were done with first year anniversary too. Not the wedding, the dating anniversary. That’s when I was sure it was him. I could eat with him for the rest of my life. May be even share pakoras, & I told him I was ready. We called our respective parents and set up the meeting. The talks happened and they were fine. I know boring, no caste or poverty issues or any crap thing. It was a green signal.

The dates were fixed, rings exchanged and we were officially couple. Just when I though it was just happiness, is when Mahi’s brother returned; of course from America.

& my life shattered.

*insert a lot of glass breaking noise*

to be continued

Oh Kids These Days

2011-08-03T13:08:00.000+05:30

Not sure where but my 2yr old niece has learnt the word “maga”, probably from hindi-to-kannada-horribly-translated-advertisement on TV

Yesterday we had few dignitaries at home, one of them being principal of prestigious Medical College for lunch. They were all praises for 2 years old; that she is very active, brilliant & kept pinching her cheeks as often as possible. Post lunch, when they were about to take leave, the kid shouts “bye maga” to him.

Not sure if any of his students had that guts to call him that way, but ya this, he’ll remember the child for many more years to come.

News that is GOOD

2011-07-29T12:52:00.000+05:30

This place is all rusted and spider-webbed. What is with the spiders and making webs at face level, I say. Ewwww!!!

We had a family reunion lately. I know all of us are 3hours apart but eegina no-time kaaladalli it’s a big deal for the “Churdaars” meet without any marriage/ thithi / naamkarna / gurhapravesha. That cousin who never comes was here as well, to take guidance from me & Sanki. Sanki was like “Ayyo 673 ranking guy asking 4 digits ranked people advice is so lame”. I just made him shut-up & spoke like I stood first in engg year 2002. He listened and took EC in RVCE, wow looks like I am super career guide material.

It’s my birthday tomorrow. I am sure the ground beneath you shook for a minute or so. Birthday and no countdown eh? Of course I will have no countdown. This is my official birthday, so I have to behave professional and all that. So just be nice and send the gifts, don’t make me become the one I am during the real birthday.

Doctor sistah is doing complete othla at home. I am sending her sms’es and tweets and calls to get my work done. Bleedy she doesn’t even move an inch. Oh, we are off to amchi Mumbai this independence day. Honestly I have no hope of coming back! I mean think about it these patriotic days are the auspicious days for blasts and all. That too in that ‘BOMB-ay’ Mother India has been instructed by her friend that it will rains all day and hence she has to carry two clothes per day. Big mistake, big mistake; even otherwise she would carry, now tho she’ll carry three. Last heard she asked sister, its 25kgs per person right?

You people have been asking “Any good news” questions way too much I think & hence giving one. I got promoted. Hello, that’s good news no? Now stop behaving like my M.I.L and congratulate me. For all the sweat/tears I have shed, I deserve happy things only. Thatha was like “Oh so promoted eh? Desktop to Laptop?” & he was serious.

P.S: You are considered totally useless if you are not daddy or mummy by your 1^st wedding anniversary!!! So start making them now at least, & btw this rule applies to those couple where one of the partner in/above 30s

Film: Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara

2011-07-18T17:47:00.000+05:30

First of all, I am amused that how can one person be talented in so many ways? Farhan is an awesome director, tonsil-husky voice that women die for, fantabulous dancer and now a better actor than Hrithik? How on earth he manages to master all methinks. Oh hold on, he is a writer too? Runs in the blood must be.

The movie revolves around the 3 best buds who have decided to take this adventure trip 4 years back. With matters related to heart, they cancel and now that Abhay is getting married to typical-nagging-GF Kalki, he suggests they take the trip now as his bachelors’ trip. Deep-sea diving at Costa Brava, sky-diving in Sevilla and the San Fermin Bull Run in Pamplona, not to forget the Tomatina festival in Bunyol, are the adventures planned by each one of them where everyone lets go the fears of life.

All of which have been beautifully shot, made me tell Pati that we cancel Switzerland and run to Spain. There are few cheesy dialogues like “Tumhari Zindagi Badalwaali Hai” by Laila a.k.a Katrina who I think was freshly assaulted by Sallu Bhai during the shooting. & make-up did not cover it up. Sad, much sad, for her; Kalki irritates the audience just like she irritates her fiancé.

Then there is Bagwati, that’s what Farhan calls the bag worth 12 thousand Euros that Abhay purchased for Kalki. Silly as it might sound, I guess people giggled the most over it. Adding on is the “Mantally Sick ho chukka hai. He is MANTAL BUOY” dialogue that lingers in my mind even now, Oh how can I forget to mention the wind in the hair feel along the road trip with horses along the green pastures.

Watch it for Farhan’s voice, Farhan’s acting, Farhan’s silliness, Farhan’s shaayari, Farhan’s emotions, Farhan’s dance… Just for FARHAN

Film: Badrinath

2011-07-12T14:29:00.004+05:30

This movie begins & I start to feel whether I came to watch “King Fu Panda 2” or “The Karate Kid” again. Yeah the Prakash raj guy who is always angry teaches set of kids some ancient martial arts where they learn slokas, & run faster than trains, jump mountains, climb upon each other and reach sky while fighting and such nonsense.

When they are old enough they choose temples like they choose “Pick & Speak” topics. Of course Badri (a.k.a HOT allu Arvind) gets Badrinath. He has to savior that temple at any cost and also he cannot use the techniques the guru taught him for his private lives i.e. love/dove. There arises a situation where there is a terrorist attack and Badri kills everyone with guns with his sword & 2 fingers. He is HOT so yes he can do whatever he wants.

Enter heroine (according to magician she is doll type sexy) who gets thrown into river and also pulled back. She hates lord and loves Badri, so then she starts loving Badrinath, lord too. He is just running around with her aste, silly girl doesn’t understand that. Then there are rowdies wearing white calling someone Sarkar, rowdy son wanting to marry heroine yada yada. Enter Badri who kills everyone again (?) and takes heroine back to Badrinath in train. There she tells him that she loves him and he hits her and asks her to get out. Meanwhile Guru who so wanted his shishya to be an aadharma brahmachaari gives permission to marry her.

In-between all this drama are like 6 songs, the awesome stills of the lord, all displaying Allu’s body, his dance moves, the action. If not for him and the hotness I would have surely given it a pass. But then for married girls like how my colleague Pavithra says “View Only” access is a boon.

Paapam Paayasam

2011-07-08T17:05:00.002+05:30

I don’t know how to make payasam, she declared.

There were lightning and thunders; & earth just cracked beneath his feet.

Payasam for him was like how NiceRoad for NidheGowdru and corruption for Chedyurappa.

He called the civil lawyer uncle who stayed next to him in the vatara.

Lawyer uncle’s wife lifted the phone, & said “Yenappa Munnar cold itha?”

Ayyo aunty had to crack a cold joke in a hot situation, wife thought.

*Talaak Talaak Talaak* annoke they were not of that Jaathi also.

What will Pati Parameshwar do anta yochnege bidhlu wifey.

That’s when he spoke, in a requesting tone “Payasam recipe kodtira aunty”

Aunty, Pati and Wifey all lived happily ever after.

Not the payasam though. It was thoroughly consumed.

Mission 7/7

2011-07-07T16:49:00.000+05:30

So that’s it. Mission 7/7 is accomplished finally. After so much of hard work, tension, last minute traumas Pati has did it in 2 years which was dad’s dream say 20 years may be.

I have to put it up here so that one day when we build something of our own we should know the efforts we both put in acquiring it at first place. The n number of battles we fought against the world and sometimes against each other just to get things right in place. Yeah today we both bought our dream plot, which had eyed for almost 2 years together and me 20 years alone. The land which someday will be converted to home; it couldn’t have been possible without few people and it would really bad from my part if I do not thank them. Vatti (I know shocking what the 19year old did), Naveen (criminal as always) and Dad.

Finally Pati, without him I surely would have given up, I love you baby!!

*ah the world is a happy place*

Breaking News

2011-07-06T16:42:00.000+05:30

Any damn news channel you watch will have one of these below:

News reader: KumarKhanna is furious over Chedyurappa’s way of running the government & has decided to stage a dharna/protest, we have reports that say that CM has asked the police not to allow the protesters to start the protest.

*shows a clip*

KumarKhanna (talks without using comma or full stop): You seeeee our honorable chief minister Chedyurappa has lost his mind where he is thinking that he cannot let the opposition party even form a protest against the government which is not itself correct how he can tell me that I cannot go against what he is doing there might be a clause that it should not be done withing 2km vicinity of Vidhana Soudha but I will do it near Basweshwara circle who will stop me

*clip ends*

News reader: We have our correspondent ABC with us, Hey ABC can you tell us what exactly is the issue.

ABC: Actually there is nothing but what KumarKhanna is trying to convey is that he is furious over Chedyurappa’s way of running the government & has decided to stage a dharna/protest, we have reports that say that CM has asked the police not to allow the protesters to start the protest (which is the same what news reader said already)

Stupid Channels Stupid News

Film: Delhi Belly

2011-07-05T17:14:00.001+05:30

First of all, I am glad I did not watch this movie in the Infy multiplex. That would be like having chicken with a bomman I suppose. Anyways I was of the feeling that I would not like the movie before I ventured into because I have never liked toilet humor. The movie starts off with the globe sa bum and ends with the hot smooch Imran & Poonam share.

In-between its Packet of diamonds, Shenaz’s boobs, VJ Anusha’s I hate you; like I love you in brackets interview, Imran’s poking stubble, Vir’s nakhush and very khush khela, Kunal’s crotch touch infected tandoori, prostitute fondling, blackmail photos, food poisoning, no water hence orange juice, Packet of stool sample, Packets delivery, Packet exchange, Gangster sliding the stool (someone puked in the theater btw), picking calls while doing, Black-eye, break-up, hair matters, Jaa chudail, Mundan, Siirrrr Lundryyyyyyy, gora gets beaten up, Shenaz’s boobs again, gangster attack, ceiling falls, dancer’s leg stuck, diamonds sale, take 90laks, Shenaz kidnap, burkhas, give back 90laks

Bhaaag D.K Bose

Enter kidnap, gunfight, slaps and kisses.

Between lots of beep beep beep beep beep words & yes SHIT.

The best is yet to come, there was this comment (stated below) in one of the review pages. I almost fell off my chair laughing. What was this guy thinking?

Request Aamir Khan that he is a Icon for young and family viewers also but after see this movies I really feed bad and shame sir. I just want to say you that you are a genious and you no need to make these type of movies for money. Sorry but Its true you really hearted us and I leave movies in first half. I feel very bad when my 4 yeard old son listen word G***U and B******D and he ask me pappa ya kya hotha hai that time I cry sir I cry

He is the real D.K.Bose

huli bantu huli

2011-06-30T15:42:00.003+05:30

I am not sure whether meeting the huLi was a good omen or brought bad luck, but currently it lifts me over the page3 status. With Mysuru Mithra & Star of Mysore, publishing the photos I am surely not complaining.

For the ignorant (who do not follow me on FB or twitter) here is what happened:

Dad called us and said that he wanted us to join him, mom and sis for the Ooty trip. The man never takes off work so we agreed instantly. Of course like last time it was disaster weather wise. It was cold, windy and rainy too, couldn’t step out of the motel. Ate slept, then ate slept, and again ate slept and then ok so you got the point. Plus I caught a horrible cold!!!

So while we were cribbing each other on the way back on Sunday June 28^th 2011 near Bandipur at 1:20pm we see “The Big Cat”. The car halts in screech, lots of clicking, no words spoken, oh wait it was actually this below conversation

Dad: Lemme open the window pane & we shall get a good view of the tiger

Sis: Oh lord, I’ll google & get you better photos, *shouts* LETS GO LETS GO

We decided we take a U turn and return back, & behold we saw the animal again. The walk, it was so majestic, did not even care of our presence, did not disturb us (nor did we) crossed the road with such elegance. Those 3 minutes were the best in my life, seriously.

Now you would ask what the big deal is, of course it is a big deal. I have heard of photographers who went deep inside the jungle just to click the animal & came out with photos of rabbits. There are people who curse the safaris coz they hardly spot any creature. But at that odd hour, spotting the creature, in the natural habitat twice and without anyone around – yeah it is a terrific deal.

P.S: finally someone out here said “Only a tiger can meet a tiger” – yeah I couldn’t agree more.

You are getting OLD

2011-06-24T17:12:00.001+05:30

One more year & you are one more year older.

Its pleasure knowing you both @LoudPotato (a.k.a Tigress) and MarenelloDreamer (a.k.a Po)

Wishing you both a very happy birthday, hope Lord gives me some strength to tolerate more years’ of your silliness

*Now where is my cake*

Reel Reality

2011-06-22T09:41:00.001+05:30

The other day we were discussing about stuff that would instill some sense of patience in you. Like soothe you down and prepare you for the upcoming stress stuff.

One thing I remember is that my mama would give me these old cassettes whose tapes were stuck while they played and got tangled. They needed to be shoved inside the cassette case again. All it required is a pencil that would fit inside the two holes the cassette had and patience, to very softly unravel, straighten the reel right.

You were expected to slowly twist the pencil after letting it inside the hole, in the right direction to send the tape in, in between also untie the knots. I would sit hours together to get that done, & once it was done I would be beautifully stressed out plus that whole day would go with so much ease.

Huh long gone are cassettes and that activity too, I am sure my kids wont even know how much of a bustle & fun it was.

Film: Shaitan

2011-06-21T19:03:00.000+05:30

Simple story, Complex characters, Awesome Music, Loose screenplay, tight dialogues, Hot Rajeev and Terrific direction.

The lesser said about the movie the better, watch it for an enthralling experience. Oh, how can I not mention anything about Khoya Khoya Chand, how well these guys have taken the most romantic song to best suit the action sequence!

To all those who complain about the horrid movies these days, this should keep you quiet. Go, get the Shaitan out of you.

P.S: That adisiya raagam is my day beginner now.

Talk in Hindi Pls...

2011-06-20T17:33:00.001+05:30

While we were tripping up north, everyone around were in praise of my Hindi.

How good it is and how well it is along the lines of the language that they talk there.

If I have to thank someone about my Hindi it would be Neha & her immediate family.

The way we conversed during my school days and ahead of them is the reason that my Hindi is so good.

Oh there is one more, who helped my Hindi. That one person always insisted I talk over Hindi coz that used to, Ah well lets not get into that. This is a family blog after all.

When and Then

2011-06-17T21:23:00.000+05:30

When I was in Orkut, you din't even know what social networking was.
When you logged and started adding fraannnnds I had already changed 63 display pics.
When you learnt to change photos I had 58 fans.
When you celebrated occasion of getting 25 fans I was bored there.
When you were breathing Orkut I killed my account.
When I started facing people you did not even know about the book.
When I was updating statuses you created an account.
When I started getting bugged you were liking my old pics.
Now when I am about to quit there and almost freaked into twitter I am sure you will follow me there.

Dude get a life and set a trend. Stop following, its not happening at all.

2 instances

2011-06-17T09:27:00.001+05:30

Why people of Mysore are known for their reasons not to change but stick to being uneducated villagers

They call 5 lights circle as Pilot circle

Of course this is named after the circle having a big pole with 5 lights in it. The British established it and called it rightly. Those days the people were not even aware of “A” of English alphabets & couldn’t pronounce the same. The made 5 lights as pilot circle. OK, mistakes happen but even till this date they call it the same. PILOT circle & if you tell them the right name they give such strange looks

They call Lansdowne building as landstone building

This building was named again by the British as Lansdowne named after the then viceroy of India. Again there was a pronunciation problem and people started calling it landstone, apparently they thought it was made up of stone.

Of course may be I am blessed to know the truth & the exact names from the cops but still when someone says a little extra or gives an information, people here are not ready to accept or listen to the facts at all.

The bottom-line is people here are not ready to take information and change. Just know it all types.

M.U.S.I.C -K

2011-06-16T12:52:00.000+05:30

Go to this below link & download the first song Kavana by Santhosh

http://www.123musiq.com/Dhan-Dhana-Dhan.htm

Then go to this below link and download Niluvadhamu Ninu epudaina

http://www.123musiq.com/NuvvostananteNenoddantana.htm

Don’t they sound same? I mean the na na chorus of Nuvastanate is the main tune in Dhan Dhana Dhan.

Oh also “Achu Mechu” of Manasology is ditto picked up from “Pehle Nazar Mein” opening tune.

Did you hear Thagalakonde from Jogaih? How come they did not take name of the great, ever loving lady Jayanti in the song? & Best is *Gandbeeri Rakshitha* no can beat that.

Anyways in between all these copycats world Music day is on June 21^st 2011. Lets all hope there is some originality soon.

Film: Kung Fu Panda 2

2011-06-15T16:50:00.000+05:30

Pati wasn’t agreeing on watching “Kung Fu Panda 2”, no matter how many tantrums I made. I hate animation, he claimed. I just gave him two choices, “To have a kid or take me to movie”, with the review coming up you all should know what he chose.
We were at this new mall in Bannerghatta road very near to Nagi’s home. Its pretty decent when compared to Manthri and certainly has some good crowd when compared to Gopalan arcade (I saw panche clad men without chappals). Meenakshi Mall offers Cinepolis, I say I was very impressed.
Po discovers that he is getting random scene flashed that he thinks is related to his parents. So he asks his goose father, to which he says that he just knows that Po was in a box filled with radish. Cut to now, the Kung Fu masters are in trouble and are to be saved. Panda, Tigress, snake, crab all set out to China where they fight the White peacock and its fire machines. Meanwhile Po discovers about his past, that peacock killed his parents, and gets inner peace and kills peacock. There isn’t really much 3D in the movie, & Angelina Jolie’s voice as tigress sounds like the animal is having an orgasm.
Po reminded me of Nagi, I am not sure why. Between if you guys visit this mall, make sure you fetch “small” category of the popcorn, coz that itself is like bucket in the PVR. I was so happy with the fact that these guys don’t fool around like Inox and PVR. We also saved some & bought home which sistah relished thoroughly.
P.S: There are 2 new malls near Jayadeva, I am sure the Kotigobba fan must be feeling more like billionaire now.

Aane Banthondh Aane

2011-06-10T10:47:00.001+05:30

I am sure you would have heard about the Rampage in Mysuru yesterday. & I think that was the best thing that happened to this otherwise boring place. The last time something like this had occurred, every other person on chat were thinking girls from this region are *that types* (Yeah courtesy Hassan guys who came & did it here)

After all the drama, those two elephants are classified into “Mischievous” a.k.a “Pundaane” category. These will be getting some kaTiNa shikshe back at Bandipur under captivity. Poor souls, I wonder what made them even come inside the city. & like all the men ventured only inside women’s colleges.

In other news, we went to Dosalicious. I loved the Bangalore like feel that restaurant has, I mean I opted for a window view & merrily saw the traffic on K.D. The spring roll dosa was a total value for money, but some Mexican Rava thing ruined the appetite. & without me asking Pati decided we go have some ice-cream at Corner House. This sis girl had once suggested Ramocca and we relished that.

So here is to my man, with elephant baLa in astrological terms gaJa kesari yoga Cheers!

Slut Walk

2011-06-08T17:45:00.001+05:30

A girl gets raped, & its her fault? Ulta chor kotwaal ko daante

Her fault that she wanted to earn bread for her family.

Her fault that her dad was a drunkard and refused to earn money.

Her fault that she did not choose to sleep with men and go work her a** off.

Her fault that she was travelling alone coz her job wanted her to.

Her fault that the man entered the ladies compartment.

Her fault that he entered the ladies conpartment.

Her fault that he raped her?

A girl has to get scared coz its all about the consequences she’ll have to face.

But what about the men? Finish their job and shoot the guilt?

That’s what you world ask for isnt it?

They say that the women who dress up *that way* are victimized coz they call for it.

Uh huh so tell me all you fools, if your sister dresses up that way will you rape her?

Do you know that 80% of the women are raped even when they wear sarees

Oh btw wasn’t that you the same men who segregated saree as one of the sexiest clothing?

What culture are you talking about?

Where we find fathers assaulting their own daughters?

Men taking on women and then blackmailing them that the society will black list them if they tell-o-tale?

To all the men who think that women are themselves responsible for the rapes, & wants to get raped, its not some kind of a fantasy.

Stop torturing the victims and start focusing on how to zip it up.

I personally feel the world will never get the point. The point of *respecting women* for what they are, what they do and most importantly how well they do!

XY & XX

2011-06-07T11:24:00.001+05:30

We were at a cousin’s engagement yesterday & while I was scanning things around I observed a whole lot that goes unsaid in such occasions.

The parents of the Bride will be the most tensed, I simply can’t tell why. Marriage is an effort from both the sides & every good/bad should be in the combined ownership as well. It is a big occasion in the life of the couple & I don’t think the parents get to witness the golden moment at all.

So the girl was draped in the Saree with great finesse & looked all pretty with the minimum amount of jewels as well. But there was something lacking, yeah she refused to smile at any point of time. I even cracked a joke, & the whole bunch of people around chuckled but she didn’t. Pati started getting tensed for the guy, that may be that the lady isn’t interested & stuff.

Then came the “Mooh Meeta Karo” situation, when the guy stuffed sweet in her mouth. & that’s when we all knew the truth. Apparently the girl has 2 cute bunny teeth & may be she was apprehensive about how the crowd would take it. She had told the same to the guy.

I told her, when the partner had no concerns why hide the happiness? & then she smiled. It added to the glory.

Oh I love happy endings.

P.S: This post was all about what happened after the sweet was fed. So the girl with total flair passed on the sweet to someone around & the guy being the guy was munching it on the stage, with no concerns whatsoever.

(In Big B tone) MEN….

Taxi..........

2011-06-06T09:25:00.000+05:30

Homecoming is one of the most happiest & celebrated events in India. It makes sense when you are away from family, friends for quite some time & the vacations are planned to be with the world & share joyous moments with them. Sometimes it’s not even told at home & you want it to be a surprise, hmm at times like these if you do not get the right transport from the airport to your home, it does take a whole lot of patience out of you.

Sometimes it’s the irritating drivers, most of the times it’s the way they quote to a hefty price & worst of all the conditions of the taxi will piss you off after returning back from the mostly systematic foreign lands. You might sit in the cab & start cursing the set-up here; well you don’t have to do that anymore, presenting “Taxi For Sure”, hassle free online booking of taxis now operating in Bangalore.

For more details have a look here http://taxiforsure.com/

& it works the other way around too. So have a try all you travelers!

Results.

2011-05-31T19:09:00.000+05:30

So the results are OUT.
& becoz I am putting this in the public forum you should know my result.
Yay, I passed.

ISTQB certified!!!
No, I am not giving any treats for this!

P.S: my cousin scored 673 in CET. I mean WTF do these guys eat I say?!

Rajni Nagavalli & Dhoni

2011-05-30T20:24:00.000+05:30

Have the people of TN forgotten that Rajnikanth is a human being. & he has to die one day? May be not today but someday, he has to.
I have a solution to offer, why not start worshipping Dhoni like Rajni. I mean of all the whistle podu situation he has created, you all must owe him that at least.
I am amazed by the fact that no TV channel has started linking Rajni's illhealth with Nagavalli. Yea like, kaaduthidaaLa naagavalli? And all? May be they'll soon.
Btw the ooty trip was a major disaster. I dont even wanna share, that level. But the climate was ummm cuddling, made me have 6 warkis. They were hot & I couldnt help. Also Gundlupet has a CCD. Not user friendly though.
More laters!

Hail Wetness

2011-05-25T11:37:00.000+05:30

Bleedy Dhoni, Ruined everything for us, he should die in hell – I was fuming after yesterday’s match. & it was the same Dhoni I was going ga-ga 2 months ago when he got us the world cup. Seriously, what has IPL done to all of us; totally divided by franchises.

What is it with the rains? Wasn’t on, when I was up by 6. Wasn’t on, when I was getting dressed up. Wasn’t on, when I was putting on my jogging shoes. Wasn’t on, when I reached 100mts from house. Was on, after that? I mean seriously? But boohoo I had the umbrella.

I had the best of best breakfast today. Turned on the stove, threw some pepper sausages, meanwhile the other pan had French omelet along with hot chocolate milk. Hello, don’t blame me, blame it on the chill weather, how else do you think I’d survive?

The monsoon is here – open up the raincoats & umbrellas & blankets. Of course don’t forget to stock baaLekaayi for the bajjis. Happy drenching!!

P.S: I think Nano guys should come up with an ad on this, showing the aam jantha getting drenched & child sneezing while a happy family is inside the car, all warm & cozy.

I hate it when

2011-05-24T17:47:00.000+05:30

*people keep tapping their toes while talking

*people barge in the middle of any conversation

*people keep commenting and joking around about rest of the world

*people who think they are best in everything

*people who have no culture to help the needy

*people who value money more than the compassionate profession

Oh actually it’s not people, its one person and its none other than you doctor!

Mukya AmshagaLu

2011-05-23T16:47:00.000+05:30

Yeddy got better again. After 12 attempts if my counting (actually churupuri’s counting) aint wrong. Earlier he was never getting to be the CM & now he is never getting to leave the throne. Some Gajakesari yogano yeno pa.

We are on the top again! Thanks to #333 that wide eyed/mouthed kid should be one happy man. Imagine the team winning and he getting to hug/peck/smooch his lady love, what else bekappa life nalli? I only hope this winning streak comtinues & converts the 3 letter word AJM to WIN.

Btw remember this news? I heard one more news today that there is a daraar in love. ROFL. That ex-sharaNe has athe kaata ante. Earlier I thought evil ladies who don’t approve of son’s happiness existed only in the movies. But you to experience the crap to believe & yes I have no doubts on that now. Oh also like in the movies, those ladies die a painfull death. I am glad about it.

We dared to venture into that Habitat mall that’s recently opened up at Mysuru, behind BM hospital (can you imagine, people call it EasyDay mall coz there is an EasyDay outlet there). So this mall basically lacks all basic amenities to think of. I am not going there again even if they give onions a rupee less than the market rate.

Aste Aste

Good Week & Bad End

2011-05-20T17:35:00.000+05:30

So this post got a few queries to my mailbox. All more interested to “be frands with me”

One person tho sent a very corporate mail, on what he does, where he does and wants to move back. Oh also said that he wanted to take a telephonic interview. So much for blogging and head hunting I tell you.

Come think of it, it was a kind of head hunting, except that the head were of morons. & a lovely week comes to an end today, much appreciation at work & all that. Oh & someone who was at food court for a promotional activity recognized me today, asked if I was from JCE, for which my colleague who was along said “Why did she hit someone there?” Ha, what reputation I say. In other news, I bought “Wide Angle” by Anil Kumble & that book is filled with Jammy’s pics. I am in love with it.

Anyways, have a happy weekend you guys. I know I won’t, the kids are back in town & there goes the silence & serenity at home. Much later Ta

Eega Headlines

2011-05-19T11:25:00.000+05:30

Ramya’s boyfriend is half-German and half-Swiss namely Raphael.
Shilpa Shetty lost her phone and I think that’s how someone found that she is preggie, which she anyways denies.
Brett Lee is bowled by Deepika’s beauty and that bugger went ahead to sing so many songs (Bollywood mind you) to her
Yeah Warne is selling chaddis, oops spinners they are called
Priety was found in tears when Gilly hit a century in the match against RCB.
Vijender is now married & Zaheer will be having a livin relationship soon.
Minisha Lamba was detained in Mumbai for wearing clothes not. For possessing diamonds worth 50lakhs.
Mallika wore a see through dress that revealed lot of things & Sonam wore something that was geometrical types.
Yes, Delhi Belly has a swearing song which the boys have already started using.

Oh, by now you might be like “Ah-what-is-this-crap-she-is-writing-which-we-already-know”. Come on, at least I said them in bullets; all those bloody local news channels will show you a 30minutes program on them. Yeah I guess you guys deserve it. May be like bachchan bahu says “Because you’re worth it”

Yellow & Blue - somewhere in between

2011-05-18T15:45:00.000+05:30

Past 3 years I have been following The United Nations Environment Program (UNEP), which announces a theme every year to focus on all aspects of environment. This year's theme 'Forests: Nature at Your Service' underscores the intrinsic link between quality of life and the health of forests and its ecosystems. Not surprisingly India will be the global host of World Environment Day 2011 (WED) on 5 June

I guess the choice on the host was unanimous on this aspect, India is a country of 1.2 billion people who continue to put pressure on forests especially in densely populated areas where people are cultivating on marginal lands and where overgrazing is contributing to desertification. Why the crisis, you may ask. It is largely due to the fact that we use too much resources, reuse too little of them and produce too much waste.

There are four major factors that have contributed to shedding of forests: agriculture and farming which requires land for growing crops & rearing animals due to which large areas of forests have been cleared leading to reduction of oxygen in the atmosphere, population explosion which means more people & indirectly more resources thereby more demands on the earth’s overburdened resources, technological advances and modern lifestyle, both of which indirectly harm to the forests.

I am sure by now you would have chosen to move-on to the next article with a frown saying “we already know this”. But have you ever realized that with the knowledge you have, you have not taken that extra step towards being the savior? I would not want to list the “To-Do” options, but urge you all, the readers not to take a small but a large initiative like green computing on this regard. Else it will always be complaining about the scorching sun in the summers & mentioning it never used to be this way earlier. Enough of bleeding blue, let’s focus on the green shall we?

Film: Hudugaru

2011-05-16T14:31:00.000+05:30

Before you begin reading this, in case you have watch “Nadodigal” then there is no need to watch this movie. Else read on...

Hudugaru is a story of 3 friends. Puneeth who is writing government exam again & again to marry his lady love Radhika Pandit (eats & eats & eats – she must have really put on few kgs during this movie) whose dad insists that he will marry off his daughter to government guy only.

Loose Maadha a.k.a Yogesh who wants to get his passport done so that he’ll go to Dubai & do what I donno (they dint say in the movie pa). The strongest link in the movie, manages to keep the audience laughing with that local voice of his & oh also wears his underwear on his head (err to dry it off post washing)

Srinagara Kitty the weakest of the 3 characters who does nothing but nodding his head, is in love with Puneeth’s sister and has a dad who is like his friend (who looks like a pimp, really)

Enter Vishal Hegde, Puneeth’s friend who commits suicide is saved by loose and then asks for help to get married to his love. Apparently girl’s dad is a big shot and so is guy’s mom (Vanitha Vasu is huge). These 3 decide to help him out, kidnap the girl & send them off to some resort. Meanwhile in the attempt, Puneeth loses his grandma & his lady love, Kitty his leg and loose his hearing ability. They get bailed out and in between start patching up their lives – loose gets a hearing aid, Kitty gets wooden leg & Puneeth’s sister too, that’s when they realize that these lovey doveys have parted ways.

Cut to climax – loose is slapping girl & puneeth is hitting guy, that how cheap they were to part ways without informing them & taking friendship for granted. See even here that Kitty doesn’t do anything but stand & watch. I was so utterly disappointed what the Belegere aliya, I mean I wonder is he the same guy in Savari I wonder.

It is a must watch if haven’t watched the tamil version, for Puneeth’s acting, loose’s comedy, Kitty’s limping. Music is ok ok & yeah the best part being, the movie is shot in ShravanabelagoLa which I think is one of the lovely places that’s being missed on movies.

NaBloPoMo 8: Tension

2011-05-13T15:37:00.000+05:30

Tension lene ki nahi dene ki cheez hothi hai. What rubbish & who is the moron who said this?

I am sure that person hasn’t taken up exams in his life at all.

Coming back, I am having a certification tomorrow at work. If I don’t clear, along with the humilation, I shall lose some self-respect and 3.5k as well.

I am at mom’s for studying and my inspiration is nothing but not losing money.

Wish me luck!

NaBloPoMo 7: Twister Ninja

2011-05-12T17:20:00.000+05:30

All these cartoon channels must be banned. No really. I mean imagine what kind of nonsense they are putting into a child’s brain?

There is Chotta Bhim who can eat 2 laddoos in 2 secs.

That stupid Mr.Bean knows nothing but teasing people around him.

Oh that Barbie series has lovely frocks & gowns & make-up & what not.

Tom & Jerry never seem to stop fighting and be friends.

Scooby-Dooby-Doo is always scared, even of his shadows.

While Johny Bravo woos all the ladies around, Richie rich has robots as his servant.

There was one sensible cartoon like Popeye, seeing whom me & sis ate lot of spinach & they refuse to air him at all?

Why are they showing & making crap out of cartoons is my question? Whatever happened to Ducktales & TailsSpin & Mouglee???

Except for Pink Panther, I love it.

With so much of crap they are also showing ads. In such way that my niece wants “Twister Ninja” ice-cream since her exam got over. Trust me we have visited entire “Quality Walls” outlets in Mysore & they have run out of it each time. One shop-keeper says those sticks get purchased box-wise & not in singles at any cost. He went ahead & too Pati’s number, said he’ll give a call when the stocks are here & demanded one rupee for the phone call even. So much for an ice-cream I tell you, karmakanda.

Just give me one plastic ball full of Joy ice-cream & I’ll not complain. & no I am not having kids after viewing all this, so doesn’t blame me :P

NaBloPoMo 6: In Sickness & In Health

2011-05-11T10:29:00.000+05:30

The month "May" by its name is the month of uncertainty

& that's exactly what was in my mind 2 yrs back this day

Will this work? Is he the chosen one? What if he is not my type?

Uncertainty on the D day!

It's been 2 years with the man – my Pati

With our efforts, much more from him & little less from me,

The word “may” has lost its meaning

& together we have created a new one “Hope”

Like the world says, "Give up," Hope whispers, "Try it one more time."

P.S: Screw you moron from the land of Dr.Suess.

NaBloPoMo 5: Guru Factor

2011-05-10T16:32:00.002+05:30

For the first time in my entire lifetime two astrologers on TV told that my stars are so right that *naa mutidella chinna agute* (Even sand will turn into gold when I touch it). Some Guru graha is doing vakra movement from Meena raashi to Mesha raashi. Al though I stopped trusting those men post Arpil 2008, it’s a cheap thrill to listen to it & grin, tease people around who are told that they’ll suffer & all that.

Bleedy he started saying good things to everyone who were around me, Pati & Sis (both belong to the same usual specimen raashi), Mom and even Dad too.

So these people were with their collars up & all that; but just then that fellow uttered something very apt. He said, this “Everyone will be happy but not as happy as | Insert my raashi | people”

So yeah cheap thrill it is & of course I am already happy than the rest.

NaBloPoMo 4: Bisi Thuppa

2011-05-09T14:53:00.000+05:30

No, I could not write yesterday & I was not being lazy too. Pati is down with throat infection & fever again, so I was yeah being TBN (typical Bharatiya Naari) & nursing him. You know what’s the biggest problem of being married into a doctor’s fam? When you trust upon a doctor and his prescriptions makes any sort of ailment go away in a zap & you cannot consult him coz your family will not take it rather well. See, I am not sure of its psychology or something, I have seen the medicines my FIL/BIL give do well a little late, like after you have been through all the suffering. You could as well refer to the police who come at the end of the crime scene.

So it’s horrible to see Pati suffering & not able to suggest him another doctor. & I also hate how terribly wrong the MIL is when it comes to fever & ailments to the son. Yes we all know that mothers are protective of their children even my mother is but you shouldn’t over do it. What will it ever happen if the son has to eat bland food i.e. no salt/pepper one day? No, she has to lure him with pickles & chicken curry & what not? I mean isn’t she doing more harm on the guy’s digestive system? & of course the guy being the guy should make n number of tantrums if I ask him not to eat them, & project me like a villain.

OK, there it is, I let go a big lump of pain that was there hiding in my throat from a really long time. & I don’t mind spitting out the “Bisi-Thuppa” rather than consuming it without my likes.

NaBloPoMo 3: Chinna Chinna

2011-05-07T22:28:00.001+05:30

Probably 1st time in the whole of my married life I stayed at home while Pati toiled at work. I slept, ate, browsed, went for a walk, got tun with caffeine and waited. The man was supposed to take me out for his friend's wedding that he cancelled (thank god before I wrapped Saree) amele called & asked to finish dinner.

Now he calls and says they've ordered pizza, he'll come by 12ish so I should sleep. Oh also we had to cancel off the tickets we booked for Chalo Dilli coz he Chaloed Office. Such a chinna my Pati is, that I dont need to buy something for Akshaya Truthiya, except that I got one. Pics tomo, I am so lazed out that this blog is coming from cell phone and not lappie.

Good Night guys, I am off to catch a movie on TV, while I wait like TBN for my husband to return home.

NaBloPoMo 2: Beware of Car Fraudsters in Bangalore & Mysore

2011-05-06T16:58:00.000+05:30

Here is an exclusive write-up after I interviewed one of my brave-yet-ego-hurt colleagues

Praveen was traveling in his car (Maruthi 800) from Madras to Mysore on May 3^rd & when he reached Electronic city in Bangalore 2 people on a bike stopped him and said that they saw smoke from the bonnet. They said they are working for Vikas Motors an authorized service center for Maruthi nearby in Attebelle, Karnataka and they are on their way to fix another car that was involved in an accident nearby. They asked him to open the Bonnet so that they can inspect what is wrong. They observed for some time and then they asked him to start the car (Praveen did not come out of his car at all). When he started he saw flames out of the engine compartment. He panicked and switched off the car. They immediately put the flame off. They said the alternator had burned out and it is totally unsafe to drive with it. They said they will change it for him if he wanted them to. He of course said yes and one of them went, came back with the part, changed it and test drove the car along with him. All these while they said that Praveen was very lucky that the car never burned up and nothing happened to him. Our guy withdrew the cash from an ATM nearby and paid them Rs. 8000 for the Genuine New Part and 100 bucks for the service. He did not forget to thank them & got back to Mysore.

Meanwhile he also called Vikas from Mandovi service center in Hunsur Road which is where he gives his car for service and the center updated him that the part costs only 4500Rs. That’s when he knew something was wrong. He called back the person (Ashok Patkar) on his number he gave him (9741176410) but the phone was switched off. He also searched for the place where he said he worked but that did not exist anywhere in Attebelle. Well, like a lightning he realized he was cheated. When he reached Mysore, Mandovi informed me that the part cost only Rs. 750. And the new one they put for him was from their previous victim’s car. This is a regular fraud that has been happening in Mysore-Banglore-Madras Stretch. To his luck when he was withdrawing money from the ATM the guy who cheated was standing next to him. Praveen hopes to get his picture from the video footage and provide the same it to the cops.

That’s one helluva of an adventure isn’t it? I have promised to do my bit by assisting him in case the cops refuse to co-operate.

NaBloPoMo 1: Quite hard, you can say!

2011-05-05T17:48:00.000+05:30

Err stop rollin over those eyes right now coz the title is not about things getting hard. It is about NaBloPoMo prompts for today.

I don’t know what is it with “May”, all kind of celebrations (weddings/house warming/naming ceremony) happen leaving me short of “what saree to wear”, “Whether to wear a saree”, “What jewels should I team it up”, “am I repeating things”. I am sure you will go on & start judging me that I am one of those ladies who spends huge amount of time staying in front of the mirror, has a saree that matches all the lis stick shades & yada yada.

But the point is I do have a MIL who insists her DIL to be that way whenever she is attending functions involving her family, & certain cases Pati too. Initially I thought its just with these two, but at one point of time in a particular occasion I witnessed a group of ladies bitch about such things. One lady said “Did you check out that saree | Insert Some Name Here | it’s the same thing she wore on | Insert Another Name Here | function”. Next one replies “Howdhu riii, so true the jewels were same too. I wonder what happened to the ones her father’s side gave”. The best reply “May be her husband put it in the pawn brokers. I heard he is investing on shares these days”

Trust me, my ears they started bleeding that moment. No joke really. So after that day, I just give a little extra attention to what I wear, how I wear, whether I repeat if at all I make a biggest decision which of course is the hardest decision too. Should I attend or not! most of the times I decide it, & 10% I let Pati decide. You see that man needs to given some chance too, the other day we were at a wedding and he really liked what the bride was wearing. He duely presented that on the birthday.

So the anniversary is nearing & I agreed to accompany him for few occasions. I hope its productive, my attendence. I will know soon & ya with each day a post, I’ll have it share with you all too.

Film: Dum Maaro Dum

2011-04-26T15:17:00.002+05:30

I think people are happy to see Junior AB fail and they simply cannot take the fact that he has done well in DMD. Else why would they give out bad reviews on the same?

DMD enthralls you with very good cinematography, narration and background score. So does all the characters within right from AB, Bips, Prateik and Aditya. But it’s Rana Dungabatti who takes away all the accolades & whistles & cheers & shouts at the theatre. He does so well for his first hindi movie. Oh also that new Mercy guy, some Muzzammil it seams, so cute he is in the movie.

AB once bad guy is now very good guy as the bad stuff causes his family to die. Bips once good girl is now forced to become a bad girl due to her career. Prateik once a good guy tries to help the bad guy but becomes the bad guy in return but is actually a good guy. Aditya Pacholi is the good guy in the outside but inside a real bad guy. Mercy a.k.a Muzzammil is not even bad or good but a cute guy who dies virgin. Rane a.k.a Govind Namdeo is showcased as the good guy but turns out to be the badass guy. Rana, is always the good guy who is the only link among the bad and the good, also the only one who is alive till the end.

The best thing about the movie is that it also illustrates that the sacred place like “Gokarna” is under the influence of Goa. Watch it only if you have been to Goa, for AB’s Thayn Thayn, Rana’s hotness and Deepika’s first item number.

P.S: Before you leave a question to ponder upon when the tag line is “Goa aaneka, chill karneka but Dum, dum nahi maarneka”, then why is the movie named Dum Maaro Dum?